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Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New funny quotes: 8389 this month

15,818 funny quotes and pics

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Updated: May 24, 2026

 

 

 

 

95 Funny told quotes

Funny told quotes have a magical way of turning any frown upside down ๐Ÿ˜‚. These witty one-liners and clever quips are perfect for adding a sprinkle of humor to your day ๐ŸŒŸ. Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood or simply want a good laugh, these quotes will have you chuckling in no time ๐Ÿ˜„. Dive in and discover a world where words dance joyfully with laughter ๐ŸŽ‰!

I am never hungrier than when I leave the dentist and told I canโ€™t eat right away.

Posted onMar 28, 2026

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

Posted onMar 28, 2026

I am just a man, a man who told a woman to calm down, so I guess this is goodbye.

Posted onMar 28, 2026

In case anyone hasn’t told you today, I’m beautiful.

Posted onMar 28, 2026

My life coach told me I didn’t make the team.

Posted onMar 28, 2026

My nutritionist told me wine doesnโ€™t count as a fruit source so now I need to find a different nutritionist.

Posted onMar 28, 2026

God: “I told you to love thy neighbor – not start trade wars with them.”

Posted onMar 28, 2026

Just told my kids it’s illegal to have the light on while we’re driving. I will not break this cycle.

Posted onMar 28, 2026

Nobody told me that it takes 1-2 business days to put a snow outfit on a toddler.

Posted onMar 28, 2026

No one told me adulting would involve trying to avoid so many scams.

Posted onMar 27, 2026

Never in the history of calming down has anyone calmed down after being told to calm down.

Posted onMar 27, 2026

I was told to be more optimistic so Iโ€™ve decided french fries arenโ€™t bad for me.

Posted onMar 27, 2026

My friend says to me, โ€œWhat rhymes with orange?โ€ And I told him, โ€œNo, it doesnโ€™t.โ€

Posted onMar 27, 2026

You told your cat how much you love him, but now itโ€™s morning, the sun is out, youโ€™re sober, and itโ€™s just weird for both of you.

Posted onMar 27, 2026

I know you miss me. The tarot lady on TikTok just told me.

Posted onMar 27, 2026

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