73 Funny weight quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Everybody loves that comfort food until you end up with that comfort body.

  Commentary:
  "Comfort food is like a warm hug for your taste buds, until it decides to give you a bear hug around your waistline! 🍔🙈 Remember, too much comfort can lead to snug pants! 😂"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Got a new high score on my bathroom scale.

  Commentary:
  🎉💪 Looks like the only game you're winning right now is the one against gravity! Keep up the great work, high score champion! 🏆🎮 #ScaleBoss #FitnessGoals

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Welcome to your 40s: here’s ten pounds.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the warm welcome of your 40s: accepting you with open arms… and ten extra pounds! 🎉🍰🍕 Don't worry, those pounds are just a souvenir from your delicious adventures in your 30s! #NewDecadeNewBodyGoals 😅💪"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: The only thing I gained so far this year is weight.

  Commentary:
  Looks like your New Year's resolution of gaining life experiences took a wrong turn and instead you gained a few pounds! 🍔🍕 But remember, you're not just gaining weight, you're gaining gravitational pull too! 💪😄 #NewYearNewMeNotSoMuch

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my keys, phone, temper, and my mind.

  Commentary:
  "Wouldn't that be a dream come true? 🤔🔑📱😡🤪 Who needs a gym membership when you have these natural weight-loss methods! Just remember to always keep your sense of humor handy, it weighs nothing 😉🤣"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a scale when your grudges are doing all the heavy lifting? 💪🏼😅 Remember, emotional baggage weighs more than any dumb old scale can measure! 🛍️"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Just once I’d like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal.

  Commentary:
  "Wouldn't that be a dream come true! 🌟 Instead, it seems like most labels have a disclaimer that translates to: Warning, may cause extra trips to the snack cabinet and sudden urge to nap. 😂 Oh, the irony of medication side effects! #WishfulThinking"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: When things get hot, they expand, so I’m just getting warmer, not gaining weight.

  Commentary:
  "If this logic holds, I must be on fire right now! 🔥 Who knew staying warm was the secret to avoiding those extra pounds! 😂🤷‍♂️ #HotGirlSummer #ExpandingMyHorizons"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I shaved my legs today and it was the fastest 3lbs I’ve ever lost in my life.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew that smooth legs could double up as a diet plan! 😂🦵 Say goodbye to the gym and hello to silky smoothness! 🏋️‍♀️💨 #LegDayGoals"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: My new diet plan is to hibernate and live off all this fat I’ve accumulated.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like you've got the ultimate winter survival strategy – move over bears, there's a new hibernator in town! 🐻🍔 #HibernateAndChill"

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