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Commentary:
"Who needs locked doors and puzzles when nature calls with urgency? 💩💥 Just remember, no hints needed for this escape mission! 😂 #DiarrheaDiaries"

bathroom, diarrhea, escape, escape room, funny situation, humor, joke, room, situation, unexpected, urgency

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My chakra went out for cigarettes.

0

2 months ago

chakra, cigarettes, humor, joke, mysticism, relaxation, spiritual
Being a woman is trying to guess what the hell is going on with your body three times a week.

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2 months ago

being, body, confusion, experience, going, guess, health, hell, humor, three, times, trying, week, weekly, woman
So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

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2 months ago

excel, feel, humor, i, irony, joke, office, once, productivity, spreadsheet, work
I’d post more pics, but I don’t want y’all falling in love all at once.

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2 months ago

attraction, falling, flirting, humor, humorist, i, ID, love, media, once, pics, playful, post, self-awareness, self-confidence, social, social media, want
Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.

0

2 months ago

confusion, directions, humor, i, irony, lost, me, people, travel, wonder
I once made the irresponsible decision to drink and drive and now I have to live the rest of my days with a coffee stain on my favorite sweater.

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2 months ago

coffee, days, decision, drink, drive, favorite, humor, i, irresponsible, live, once, regret, rest, stain, sweater

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on X this month:

Yoga is just slow motion breakdancing.

49 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I am crumbling under the tyranny of constantly needing to ‘Create an Account’.

93 shares on WeChat this month:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my kid noticing her sibling got a bigger slice of cake.

29 shares on Discord this month:

I’m tired of adding ‘LOL’ to the end of my texts for sensitive people.

42 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

36 shares on Threads this month:

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

91 shares on X this month:

I’m thinking stuff like “yeah” and also stuff like “yup.”

53 shares on Twitch this month:

The only traditional costume people around me wear is sweatpants.

84 shares on WeChat this month:

I say things I don’t mean on spicy chicken.

76 shares on Twitch this month:

Just spent a couple seconds concerned about the sounds my stomach was making before realizing it was a motorcycle outside.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

Follow me on Instagram if you want to see me post absolutely nothing for weeks.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

I can turn wine into water about two hours after drinking it. Checkmate Jesus.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Women love it when you approach them on the street and say “whoa, is there a hot babe convention in town?”

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Abandoned amusement parks are so creepy. It’s no wonder they were abandoned.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Banks: You are broke, so we are going to charge you for being broke.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

Babe, what’s wrong? You’ve barely tweeted your manic thoughts today.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Later is the best time to do anything.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

This time last night, there was a spider so big in my bathroom it put me under a glass on a postcard and carried me out.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

The toughest part of being a vegan is keeping it to yourself.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

I totally understand those uncles and aunts who don’t attend gatherings.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Females be naked so much online, I be like, damn, I bet she look good in a sweater.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I have many talents, all equally un-monetizable.

Trending via Messenger:

I’ll find a cell mate before I’ll ever find a soulmate.

Breaking via Reddit:

In Star Wars, anyone can hop in any spaceship and knows how to fly it. I just spent 20 minutes trying to find the headlights in a rental car.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

Going viral on Messenger:

Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?

Seen just now on YouTube:

Oh no, a login from a new device? And that device is my phone? The one that I use every single day? And the location is my house, you say? Thank you so much for warning me. I will contact Interpol.

Just landed via Instagram:

The 70s, 80s, and 90s were the best decades – so many memories, no evidence.

Spotted on Twitch:

Laundry has to be the most sinister chore. Always waiting, always lurking.

Just shared via Instagram:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

My chakra went out for cigarettes.

Being a woman is trying to guess what the hell is going on with your body three times a week.

So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

I’d post more pics, but I don’t want y’all falling in love all at once.

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.

I once made the irresponsible decision to drink and drive and now I have to live the rest of my days with a coffee stain on my favorite sweater.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨