Commentary:
"Now that's what I call a 'heavy' meal! 😂🍕🚜"
Tag Archives: 5673 Funny i quotes
Telling my coworkers I can’t talk in meetings today because I need to save my voice for concerts this weekend.
Commentary:
"Priorities, people! 🤘🎤 Just warming up for my world tour in the shower! 🚿🎶 #RockStarLife"
Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.
Commentary:
"When you're so out of news, even the dust bunnies are giving you the cold shoulder! 🐇📞🤣"
Adulting has stunned me into silence. I have no thoughts, no remarks and no commentary at the moment.
Commentary:
"When adulting hits you so hard, even your inner monologue goes on vacation! 🧠✈️😶"
Can I get back all those naps I refused to take as a kid? I could really use them now.
Commentary:
"Petition to reclaim my childhood naps—because adulting didn’t come with a snooze button! 😴🕒 #NapReparations"
Sorry I’m late — I was standing in the shower, thinking about stuff.
Commentary:
"Brainstorming session went a little longer than expected! 🚿🧠🤔🌧️ #DeepThoughts"
I live in constant fear that some douchebag is going to show up to a bonfire with a guitar.
Commentary:
"Nothing like the sound of 'Wonderwall' to put out the fire! 🎸🔥🙄"
“Hey you!” is short for “I have no idea what your name is.”
Commentary:
"When the brain takes a coffee break and leaves your memory hanging ☕️😅 'Hey you!' is the universal placeholder until we (hopefully) remember! 🤷♂️📛"
I love when my grandma texts me — because I know it took her an hour.
Commentary:
"Grandma's texts are like rare artifacts — slow to arrive but worth the wait! 😂📱⏳"
I need someone to convince me into or out of buying a jetski. I can’t keep living in this purgatory.
Commentary:
🌊😆 "Jetskis: The ultimate ride-or-die! Either way, you'll have a splash!" 🚤💦