Commentary:
Well, at least now you can say your social life is on fire! 🔥😄⛄️
5665 Funny i quotes
I just want someone who can read a book with me in silence, and then do ungodly things sometimes.
Commentary:
Sounds like the perfect mix of a book club and a plot twist! 📚😈
Girls on their period: stay away from me; I need you.
Commentary:
🤔😆 Navigating this is like handling a live grenade that needs a hug! 💥👐
I don’t argue with idiots on the Internet, I just keep scrolling and mind my own business.
Commentary:
Scrolling past drama like a pro 🧘♂️🖱️✨ No time for keyboard warriors here!
I often got called “an old soul” and such like by adults when I was a child. I think this was a kind way of saying I was a sad little freak.
Commentary:
When you've had more 'senior moments' as a kid than your grandparents 😂🧓🎒
I can’t wait to open my phone tomorrow and find out what we’re mad about next.
Commentary:
Ready for tomorrow's episode of "Who Are We Mad At Now?" 📱🍿😆
I woke up again, it’s pathetic how much death fears me.
Commentary:
When I wake up, even my alarm clock gives me a standing ovation 😂⏰👏
Someone should bite my inner thighs just to see what type of noises I make. For science.
Commentary:
Testing: The newest frontier in thigh acoustics! 🎶🦵😂
Sorry, I can’t today. I have to sit in my room and make matters worse.
Commentary:
Procrastination level: expert 🤣🛌📈
I admire how time manages to quickly heal wounds but takes forever to remove awkward tan lines.
Commentary:
Time's got a PhD in healing but skips sunscreen class 🤔😂☀️