47 Funny mouth quotes

• Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

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  2 months ago

  bonsai, bonsai tree, broccoli, challenge, Chinese, Chinese restaurant, chop, dining, dining experience, dishes, eating, eating challenge, experience, feel, fit, food, food joke, humor, i, joke, mouth, restaurant, restaurants, tree, trying

• If there’s no open mouth cougher on the plane they hold the flight until they can find one.

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  2 months ago

  cougher, flight, flight delay, hold, humor, joke, mouth, open, open mouth, plane, travel, waiting

• A mustache is just mouth bangs.

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  2 months ago

  bangs, grooming, humor, just, mouth, mustache

• Bro, you’re not allowed anymore to have your tongue drop out of your mouth and form a stair case when you see my wife.

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  2 months ago

  bro, case, drop, form, funny observation, humor, jealousy, mouth, observation, relationship, stair, staircase, tongue, wife

• Dentist appointments are so weird. “Hi, nice to meet you, could you root around in my mouth for a bit?”

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  2 months ago

  appointments, around, awkward, bit, dentist, humor, meet, mouth, nice, root, weird

• Keeping my mouth shut is usually not enough to avoid an argument with my husband. I also have to deactivate the subtitle function on my face.

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  2 months ago

  argument, avoid, communication, enough, face, function, humor, husband, i, marriage, mouth, relationship, shut, subtitle

• I wish my hair had as much volume as my mouth.

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  2 months ago

  hair, humor, i, mouth, much, self-deprecation, volume, wish

• If I’m ever murdered, feel comfort in knowing I ran my mouth until the bitter end.

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  2 months ago

  bitter, bitter end, comfort, dark, dark humor, end, ever, feel, humor, i, knowing, mouth, murder, ran, ran mouth, sarcasm

• On a dare, my son sprayed deodorant in his mouth. Now he speaks with an Axe scent.

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  2 months ago

  Axe, dare, deodorant, humor, mishap, mouth, parenting, scent, son

• The eyes are the windows to the soul. A mustache is the front garden, and the mouth is that big pothole the council should do something about.

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  2 months ago

  big, council, eyes, front, garden, humor, mouth, mustache, pothole, should, something, soul, Windows

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