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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Every app is a dating app if you are creepy enough.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Second day without coffee. I can no longer hear out of my left eye.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Garlic and bread is the only marriage I truly have faith in.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

There are people that make their bed every morning and people who think it’s a waste of time, and then they marry each other.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

I have no desire to work now. I had five days off in a row where I dined at a feast and was entertained at a cinema. I have flown too high to return to a laptop.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

“She’s so self-centered.” Who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

Whenever I get up my cat gets up too and then yells at me like it’s my fault she decided we have to do this together.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

How do I tell Instagram I don’t want to see guys almost eaten by gators?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

18 minutes ago

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I’ve sacrificed a sheep.

Going viral on Twitch:

What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

Shared recently on Threads:

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.

Trending via Telegram:

Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again.

Going viral on Slack:

Why would I get married when it’s a well-known fact that only 50% of all marriages end in divorce?

Just shared via WeChat:

Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Getting mad at your hair is a whole different kind of angry.

Live now on Snapchat:

If I let you into my life, I am either emotionally invested or you are a grilled cheese sandwich.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Nobody victim blames more than my oldest son when he’s in trouble for punching his little brother.

Seen just now on Slack:

That moment when a zombie out for brains walks past you.

Home » Funny Pissed Quotes » Page 2

13 Funny pissed quotes

More funny pissed quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: I don’t understand the concept of “the man of your dreams”. Every time my wife wakes up after dreaming about me, she is really pissed off about something dream me did.

Commentary:
Sounds like dream you needs to work on his behavior if he wants to live up to the title of "man of her dreams"! 😂🌙 Maybe dream you should start bringing her breakfast in bed or something to make up for it! 🍳☕ Just a suggestion!
6 months ago
Share →: Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

Commentary:
Sounds like a classic case of "opportunity knocks, but it's just to annoy you instead of it bringing you joy." 🚪😤 Who knew frustration could be so persistent and exhausting, right? Maybe it's time for opportunity to knock a little quieter next time, or just bring some chocolate instead! 🍫😅
6 months ago
Share →: You didn’t let me know you got home safely so you better at least be injured or I’m gonna be pissed.

Commentary:
"Well, if no injuries, at least come back with a dramatic story about fighting off a pack of wild squirrels on your way home 🐿️🤣 Safety first, but entertainment value a close second, right?"

For even more funny pissed quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

18 minutes ago

3,422

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Why is there a level 6 for toasters? As if someone thinks: “Tonight I’m really in the mood for ashes with butter!”

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

I feel like people just come to the airport to cough.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Thinking about stepping down from being an adult, I’m just not in the right headspace for this position right now. I really appreciate the opportunity though.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

If it hurts you more than it hurts them, you are holding the taser wrong.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Shout out to Yamaha for being like, “Here’s a cool motorcycle. Also, here’s a cool piano.”

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I don’t get how alcohol turns y’all evil. I just start giggling and get slutty.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Capri Sun tastes as if scientists had bet that they could make fruit juice without fruit.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

If stores want to accurately display clothes for people over 40, the mannequins should be laying on a couch.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Women swear they be broke… Then, all of a sudden, here comes that Shein delivery.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

According to my chocolate advent calendar, tomorrow is Christmas.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

Trending via WeChat:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

One day we will tell our grandkids how far we had to scroll to get to the recipe.

Trending via Reddit:

My dream is being pitted against the world’s greatest AI in a writing contest and crafting a story that’s so beautiful that I make the computer cry.

Just shared via Snapchat:

The most difficult thing you’ll do as a parent is not rearrange the ornaments after the kids put them on the tree.

Spotted on Messenger:

Don’t worry, nobody noticed the weird thing you did. They’re too busy with the weird thing you said.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I don’t always listen to Metallica, but when I do, so do my neighbors.

Reported on Telegram:

Lazy Rule: Can’t reach it, don’t need it.

Just shared via Threads:

Some people exercise every day. Right now, I’m watching a show I don’t like because the remote fell on the floor.

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