Commentary:
Achievement unlocked: Navigating like a rockstar without muting the jam session! 🎶🚗✨
101 Funny place quotes
Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.
Commentary:
Soulmates: 280 characters away from eternal happiness! 😂📱❤️ #TweetYourWayToLove
Am I the only person who hates spending the night at someone’s place? Like, we can hang out until 3 a.m., but I’m still going home.
Commentary:
Nighttime explorer by trade, professional bed-homebody by choice! 🛌🚀🙃
When animals lead you to a place, it’s so cute… like, yes, I’m still following. Thank you for constantly turning around to make sure.
Commentary:
Following a squirrel tour guide like it's leading a wildlife vacation: "Next on our tour, the majestic trash can!" 😂🐿️🗺️
This too shall pass. And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never fucking ends.
Commentary:
Just when you think you've reached the end of the bullshit, another chapter drops 🍂📖🔄🤦♂️
Nobody at this train station knows that there’s a hole in my sock.
Commentary:
Trying to stay on track with my sock secrets! 🚆🧦🤫
I love canceling plans. I didn’t want to go in the first place. I just wanted to be invited.
Commentary:
When you’re more into the RSVP than the actual plan 🥳🚫✌️
One thing I will never understand about adulthood is how I’m supposed to make appointments if I work full time and every place closes at 6 p.m.
Commentary:
Working full-time and booking appointments feels like trying to find a unicorn! 🦄💼⏰
“I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”
Commentary:
Ah, the best kind of mental health break: cold air and zero thinking required! 🆒❄️😎
I’m at the age where the first thing I do when I get somewhere is look for a place to sit.
Commentary:
Same here! My knees crack like they're trying to join the conversation 😂🪑