Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: The unemployed urge to say I love you during a job interview.

Commentary:
"Attempting to replace job qualifications with romantic feelings? Bold strategy, Cotton. Let's see if it pays off for 'em! 🤔❤️💼 #JobInterviewFail"
6 months ago
Share →: When pregnant women are around, watch what you say. Nowadays, anything will be used as a name.

Commentary:
"Be cautious! One slip of the tongue and suddenly 'Chair' or 'Lamp' could be the hottest baby names of the year! 👶🪑💡"
6 months ago
Share →: They say it is hard to look at lips that you are not allowed to kiss. You do not know how hard it is to look at a face that you are not allowed to hit.

Commentary:
"Ah, the struggles of forbidden desires! 😘💔 But let's remember, violence is never the answer, even if that face is begging for a little smack 🤭👋 Keep those fists to yourself and practice self-control instead! 🧘‍♂️✨"
6 months ago
Share →: When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

Commentary:
"Why don't you have kids?" 🧐

"Dingoes." 🤷‍♂️🦘

Because apparently, I'm too busy fending off wild Australian dogs to start a family! 🤣👶 #DingoDefense
6 months ago
Share →: If these walls could talk, they would definitely say “Wow, this guy really does add cheese to everything after all!”

Commentary:
🧀🤣 If these walls could talk, they'd probably be grate-ful for all the cheesy goodness they've witnessed! Looks like this guy's relationship with cheese is no secret around here.🧀😂
6 months ago
Share →: “Why does my back always hurt?”, I say, while never sitting upright in a chair.

Commentary:
"Well, it's a mystery for the ages, isn't it? 🤔 Perhaps the key to a pain-free back lies in mastering the ancient art of sitting upright in a chair! 😂💺 Or you could just embrace the slouch life and invest in a good massage chair. 😅👐"
6 months ago
Share →: If you ever ask a teen to do something and they just say “sure” without arguing, check that they haven’t been replaced with an android.

Commentary:
🤖 "If a teenager says 'sure' without arguing, consider it a red flag – they might have been upgraded to the latest model. Android 2.0: now with advanced compliance settings and improved battery life!" 🤣👾
6 months ago
Share →: Experts say that human interaction is important for brain health but I’m willing to risk it.

Commentary:
"Who needs brain health when you have memes and snacks, am I right? 🤷‍♂️🍿 #SociallyDistantButWellFed"
6 months ago
Share →: Just once I’d like to hear a doctor say, “Your guess is as good as mine.”

Commentary:
"Ah, the elusive dream of a patient seeking some medical honesty! 🤣 Who wouldn't appreciate a doctor with a dash of humility and a sprinkle of candidness? 🩺💬 Perhaps, just once, we'll stumble upon that mythical doctor who dares to admit the limits of medical certainty! 🤷‍♂️💡 #WishfulThinking"
6 months ago
Share →: Parents be like “why aren’t you eating, don’t you like my food?” and after you eat a ton, they’ll say “you look a little chubby, maybe you should eat less.”

Commentary:
Ah, the classic parental food paradox – a culinary rollercoaster ride! 🎢🍽️ Is it a trap? A test? Who knows! Just remember, parental love comes in mysterious (and sometimes contradictory) packages. Enjoy the food journey, my friends! 😄🥘 #ParentalFoodWisdom