346 Funny say quotes

• It’s cute when kids say what they want to be when they grow up. You’re gonna write emails on the computer, buddy.

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  2 months ago

  aspirations, computer, cute, emails, grow, grow up, humor, kids, say, want

• If a stranger starts talking to me in an elevator I say “I don’t want to talk in case we get stuck and I have to eat you” that usually shuts them up.

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  2 months ago

  awkward, case, conversation, eat, elevator, humor, i, joke, me, say, shut, shut up, stranger, survival, talk, talking, want

• Whenever someone tells me how well behaved my kids are, I say it’s cause they’re not at home.

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  2 months ago

  behaved, behavior, cause, home, humor, i, kids, me, observation, parenting, say, someone, well, well behaved, whenever

• When you say “You’re going to hate me for this,” you’re making a very large assumption that I don’t hate you already.

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  2 months ago

  assumption, going, hate, humor, i, making, me, relationship, say

• I wish I loved anything as much as people love to say they are “thrilled” on LinkedIn.

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  2 months ago

  anything, enthusiasm, expression, humor, i, LinkedIn, love, media, much, people, sarcasm, say, social, social media, thrilled, wish, workplace

• The question “how is work” really pisses me off. Work is work, bro, I don’t know what else you want me to say.

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  2 months ago

  annoyance, bro, daily, daily grind, else, expectations, frustration, grind, humor, i, know, me, question, response, say, want, work, workplace

• My favorite condiment is Worcestershire sauce. Why? It’s hard to say.

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  2 months ago

  condiment, favorite, food, hard, humor, joke, pun, sauce, say, taste, worcestershire, Worcestershire sauce

• I think one quality that makes me incredibly attractive is that I keep my mouth shut when I have nothing to say.

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  2 months ago

  attractive, confidence, humor, i, keep, me, mouth, nothing, quality, say, self-awareness, shut, think

• If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all: I watched Rebel Moon 2 and the Netflix app worked well. Showed me the entire movie. In color.

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  2 months ago

  2, app, color, entertainment, humor, i, me, moon, movie, Netflix, nice, rebel, Rebel Moon, sarcasm, say, well

• People drive you insane and then say “see, I told you that you’re insane.”

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  2 months ago

  drive, humor, i, insane, irony, people, psychology, relationships, say, told

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