108 Funny self-care quotes

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  3 months ago

  Share →: I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

  Commentary:
  "Life goals: eat like a caterpillar, nap like a pro, and emerge from that cocoon looking fly as heck! 🐛💤🦋 #ButterflyTransformationInProgress"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Doing some skin care routine but my skin doesn’t care.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like your skin is the ultimate rebel, totally unfazed by your diligent skincare routine! 😂🤷‍♀️ Who needs soft skin when you can have an attitude, right? Keep pampering that sassy skin of yours, maybe one day it'll decide to play nice! 😜✨ #SkincareStruggles

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  3 months ago

  Share →: After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'rebooting the face' process! Just like a computer needing a restart after a major glitch 😂💄💁‍♀️. Who knew mastering the art of perfecting a resting b***h face could be so time-consuming? 😏⏰ #BeautyStruggles"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: I was neglecting my root chakra at the time, your honor.

  Commentary:
  "Well, your honor, turns out my root chakra was feeling quite unappreciated 🙈🌿 Maybe that's why I ended up in this predicament! Who knew chakras could be so influential in legal matters? #ChakrasNeedLoveToo"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Drink coffee, avoid idiots, read books and repeat.

  Commentary:
  "Life's simple recipe for success: ☕️ Drink coffee to stay awake, 🧠 avoid idiots to stay sane, 📚 read books for wisdom, and then just hit that repeat button! 🔄 Now, who's up for some caffeine-fueled enlightenment and idiot-free adventures?"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: These days, you gotta have a job for the bills and another job for yourself.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'job-ception' strategy – one for bills, one for thrills! 🤑💼 Who says you can't be your own boss while still being a team player in the workforce? 🤪 #WorkHardPlayHard"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Declined stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office because no one needs that kind of negativity in her life.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a scale when you can measure your self-worth in cupcakes per day instead? Doctor's orders: one cupcake a day keeps the negativity away!"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Dancing alone in your home is its own kind of therapy.

  Commentary:
  Who needs a therapist when you have a spacious living room and a killer playlist! 💃🏡 Let those walls be witnesses to your fabulous moves and joyful heartbeats! Dance like nobody's watching… because, well, nobody is! 😄🎶 #HomeIsWhereTheDanceFloorIs

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Sex is cool but have you ever had your bed all to yourself.

  Commentary:
  "Sex is cool and all, but have you ever experienced the bliss of starfishing in bed without a care in the world? 🌟😴 Who needs a cuddle buddy when you've got the entire bed for your own personal sprawling adventures? 😂 #BedHogLife"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

  Commentary:
  "Embrace your inner craziness… it's the secret ingredient to a balanced diet of madness! 🤪🥗 #HealthyInsanity"

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