47 Funny wake up quotes

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  3 months ago

  Share →: My superpower is to wake up more tired than I was when I fell asleep.

  Commentary:
  "Move over, Superman! This superhero wakes up ready to conquer the world… of nap-taking 💤😂 #SleepySuperpowers"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don’t know whether to get dressed or fake an illness.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the eternal struggle between responsibility and the allure of the warm, cozy bed. It's a tough decision – do you face the world with your hair brushed and teeth cleaned, or do you embrace the dramatics and call in "sick" to work, only to spend the day binge-watching your favorite show? Decisions, decisions… morning dilemmas at their finest!

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Just once I’d like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear “Monday has been cancelled,” and then go back to sleep.

  Commentary:
  "If only Mondays had a snooze button! Imagine the joy of waking up to the news that Monday has been cancelled – a dream come true for everyone who needs just a little more weekend in their life. Who knows, maybe one day the universe will grant us the ultimate Monday morning gift – an extra day of relaxation and Netflix binge-watching. Until then, we'll just have to keep hitting that 'snooze' button on our alarms and dream of a world without Mondays!"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

  Commentary:
  Waking up early to exercise? More like hitting snooze and dreaming about being fit! 🛌😴💪 #MorningStruggles #FitnessGoalsFailed

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Forget tequila, I’m at the age where you can wake up with a hangover from Netflix.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs shots when you've got binge-watching skills sharp enough to leave your brain feeling fuzzy the next morning? 🍹😜📺 #NetflixNights #HangoverHeroes"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: My body is in shock this morning from having to wake up early and wear hard pants.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew the struggle of wearing hard pants could be so real? 😂 Sending thoughts and prayers to your body as it copes with this tragic start to the day! 🙏 #BringBackSweatpants"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Woke up and immediately broke my resolution to be less sexy this year.

  Commentary:
  Looks like someone's setting the bar too high for themselves in 2022! 🤣 Time to embrace that natural charisma and just roll with it. Who needs resolutions when you're naturally a jaw-dropper, right? 😉

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

  Commentary:
  "Ah, yes, the ultimate tease from our subconscious – giving us the tantalizing buildup in a sex dream, only to rudely awaken us right before the main event! 😏 It’s like a non-consensual cliffhanger from the dream world – talk about a plot twist! 😂 Sweet dreams or blue-balled nightmares? You decide! 🌙✨"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

  Commentary:
  "Imagine a world where happy little trees are painted with a side of intimidation 😳🖌️🕴️ Who knew the joy of painting could lead to the art of organized crime? 🎨💰 #HappyAccidents #CriminalMasterpiece"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: You ever wake up in the morning and your first thought is ‘I can’t wait to go to bed tonight’?

  Commentary:
  "Ah yes, the daily struggle of adulting summed up perfectly! 😂 Embrace the cycle of looking forward to sleep while trying to stay awake during the day 🌛💤 #adultingwoes"

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