Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $2 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst birthday presents ever.

Commentary:
Looks like the stakes are high with that $2 scratch ticket! 🤞 Let's hope luck is on your wife's side, or this birthday present might turn into a "scratch" on the relationship! 😂🎂
6 months ago
Share →: I don’t understand the concept of “the man of your dreams”. Every time my wife wakes up after dreaming about me, she is really pissed off about something dream me did.

Commentary:
Sounds like dream you needs to work on his behavior if he wants to live up to the title of "man of her dreams"! 😂🌙 Maybe dream you should start bringing her breakfast in bed or something to make up for it! 🍳☕ Just a suggestion!
6 months ago
Share →: I think my wife has got early Alzheimer’s. Every day she tells me that she has no idea what she first saw in me.

Commentary:
Ah, a classic case of selective amnesia blended with a touch of marital honesty! 🤣 It seems like your wife might need a memory boost or maybe just some upgraded rose-tinted glasses! 👓💭 Just remind her of your charm and wit, and she'll remember why she fell for you in the first place! 😉🌟
6 months ago
Share →: I always work very hard and intensively to ensure that my wife can proudly say: “That idiot over there? Yes, that’s mine!”

Commentary:
"Working hard, not just to impress the boss or get that promotion, but to make your significant other beam with pride. 🏆💼🤪 #RelationshipGoals #CrazyInLove"
6 months ago
Share →: Spent the day decorating the house for Christmas and my wife spent the day re-decorating the house for Christmas.

Commentary:
Sounds like a merry-go-round of decorating decisions! 🎄🎁 Someone's aiming for that perfect festive flair! 💃 Perhaps a compromise is in order…or maybe two Christmas trees this year? 🎅🤔
6 months ago
Share →: I wish my wife’s sighs came with subtitles.

Commentary:
"Ah, the universal struggle of deciphering the language of sighs 😂🔍 If only we had a subtitle option for those moments! Who knows, maybe it would save us from a lot of confusion and guesswork 💭🤔😅"
6 months ago
Share →: “You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'dishwasher loading dispute' – a tale as old as time! 🍽️😅 Looks like the dishwasher duty switcheroo is real, folks! Remember, it's all fun and games until you become the designated dishwasher master!🧼🤷‍♂️"
6 months ago
Share →: I ain’t typing “X” into the URL bar, my wife is right behind me.

Commentary:
Looks like someone's playing it safe on the internet to avoid those questionable searches popping up! 🕵️‍♂️ Better keep it family-friendly before your wife becomes the new Sherlock Holmes of your search history! 🔍😂
6 months ago
Share →: I’m the type of husband that helps his wife look for her missing chocolate that I ate.

Commentary:
Oh, the classic case of the mysterious disappearing chocolate! 🍫😂 This husband takes the term "partners in crime" quite literally – even if it means searching high and low for a missing treat that's already made its way into his belly! 🕵️‍♂️😋 #MarriageMysteries
6 months ago
Share →: Nobody has ever been more surprised than a husband hearing about his wife’s plans for the second time.

Commentary:
🤷‍♂️ "Nobody's face has seen more shock than a husband realizing his wife's plans have turned into a sequel! 🤯 Who knew life with a spouse could be a series of surprises? 😆"