The main reason I got divorced was cause I got married.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

I hope this email keeps you awake at night.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Imagine you’re on jury duty and the courtroom sketch artist draws stink lines above you.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Nose so runny it just signed me up for a 10k.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

“You smell so good!” Okay, so kiss me.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Even Hotmail is hotter than me.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

I have a sundress and no man to bend me over in it, sad day.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

If I have to look at any more spreadsheets today, you’re gonna have to spread my ashes.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Everyone’s gangster until they need to pee.