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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need a special occasion to buy a cake.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

There are people who have a favourite colour, and there are people whose favourite colour is purple. These are very different things. Purple fans are different creatures.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Starting to think I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Used shampoo containing caffeine. My hair is already on its way to work.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Accidentally punched myself in the face as I was getting dressed this morning, and I have to say, I deserved it.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Before social media, you had to actively go out and find crazy people.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Come on, brain, release the happy chemicals.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,819

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

The best essential oils are the ones that drip out of Tacos.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Just landed via YouTube:

I’ll rewind a movie, get on my phone, and miss the same part.

Shared recently on X:

The end of Twitter is taking forever. Did Tolkien write this?

Making waves on Instagram:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Shared recently on X:

The subtle art of letting yourself go crazy once in a while.

Just shared via Pinterest:

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

3 months ago

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Commentary:
When stretching turns into a strategic game of Twister! 🕺🌀🤣

50s, age, aging, fitness, humor, middle, middle age, stretch, stretching, welcome, wrong

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Can I come over and look at your Hot Wheels collection?

1 month ago
car, collection, hobby, hot, Hot Wheels, humor, i, over, playful, toy, visit, wheels
I love how “sleeping in” used to mean noon, and now it means 8:30 a.m.

2 weeks ago
am, change, humor, i, lifestyle, love, mean, means, morning, noon, routine, sleep, sleeping, sleeping in, time, used
Monetizing Twitter was actually the worst thing to happen to this app. Everybody rage-baiting for 23 cents.

2 weeks ago
actually, app, behavior, happen, humor, media, monetization, money, online, online behavior, rage bait, ragebaiting, social, social media, thing, Twitter, worst
I’ve tasted being employed, and I’ve tasted being unemployed. I recommend not being born.

1 month ago
being, born, employed, employment, existential, humor, humor quote, i, job, life, recommend, sarcasm, unemployed, unemployment, work
“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

1 month ago
again, chores, cleaning, dishes, doing, food, going, hours, humor, irony, just, pointless, put, satire, waste, water
People say “I would never,” then here they come nevering like they never nevered before.

5 months ago
before, behavior, contradiction, here, humor, i, irony, never, people, say

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Never underestimate my ability to fall asleep in a moving vehicle.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

Ain’t no way there’s billions of us and nobody got superpowers.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

McDonald’s only giving me 9 Chicken Nuggets instead of 10 is how my villain origin story began.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Now hush, Lil Labubu, don’t you cry, everything’s gonna be Dubai.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Hey there, Delilah, we know you broke that dude’s heart.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Just a reminder that you’re not allowed to hit your coworkers. Even if they’re stupid. I asked. Twice.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that things will get better.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If anything goes wrong today, just dramatically whisper, “The prophecy has been fulfilled,” and walk away.

Just shared via Slack:

I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Croutons feel like an apology. “Sorry we gave you salad. Have some consolation toast.”

Spotted on TikTok:

Kim Kardashian wants her ashes to be scattered in the sea after her death. As if there wasn’t enough plastic there already.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

That awkward moment when someone is doing the dishes, and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

Just shared via YouTube:

Can’t say “I’m tired” without my mom making it a competition of who is the most tired and who has more reason to be.

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Activity Log ✨

Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

Can I come over and look at your Hot Wheels collection?

I love how “sleeping in” used to mean noon, and now it means 8:30 a.m.

“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

People say “I would never,” then here they come nevering like they never nevered before.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

“Careful. It’s slippery!” – Everyone, after you’ve already slipped.

Dropped my skinny boyfriend between the bed and the wall like a vape or a TV remote.

I’m going to sleep. Anyone want anything?

It must be hard to be a rapper knowing at any moment your enemies may make beautiful poems about you.

People my age are on baby #2, and I’m on drink #5.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

This is the wrong generation for people with an old soul.

What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger, but also a little grumpy.

Yeah, sex is cool and all, but have you ever crawled out of the worst depression of your life and got your spark back?

This call, should’ve been a message in a bottle I never found.

Got a job rejection, saw the company post the same job again, so I applied again. I decide when we’re done.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

When is this robot army coming to take my job?

Thank you for your password, now we are going to text you another password, then put that one in. Click ‘remember this computer’ so we can forget it.

Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line.

November doesn’t have afternoons. It’s just morning until 2 p.m., then night.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I have so much to offer. It’s all bad, but still.

The most valuable breed of cow are the Cash.

Amazing how fast my addiction to my phone is cured the moment I get a phone call.

Relationship status: you’d think something called a Roomba would be a better dancer.

Dear life, when I said “can this day get any worse” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

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Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Can I come over and look at your Hot Wheels collection?

I love how “sleeping in” used to mean noon, and now it means 8:30 a.m.

Monetizing Twitter was actually the worst thing to happen to this app. Everybody rage-baiting for 23 cents.

I’ve tasted being employed, and I’ve tasted being unemployed. I recommend not being born.

“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

People say “I would never,” then here they come nevering like they never nevered before.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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