Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Not to brag but I don’t need alcohol to do something stupid.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

I don’t drink and drive, but some people drive me to drink.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Breakfast in bed: where your cozy blanket turns into a crumby crime scene.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,987

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

The 80s were wild, man. You had bands naming themselves after predatory cats with hearing problems.

Just landed via Twitch:

“Too much garlic”? What’s next? Too much love? Too much desire?

Making waves on Facebook:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hrs, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

Just shared via Reddit:

Weight gain makes me sad. Luckily, eating cheers me right back up.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

(to the boys in the yard) I hope you brought your own milkshake.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”

Why did they have to bleep out everything R2D2 said?

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Maybe they bleeped out R2D2 because he had a beep mouth! 🤖🤐 #BeepBeepCensorship

bleep, dialogue, everything, humor, movie, R2D2, robot, sci-fi, star, Star Wars, wars, why

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

1 month ago
agriculture, burger, cow, doing, food, forever, humor, irony, meat, nature, plant, plants, turning, wait
But he was so nice on the prison phone calls.

1 month ago
calls, conversation, humor, irony, nice, phone, prison, unexpected
Good morning to everyone except people who sit right next to you when there’s a whole room full of empty seats.

1 month ago
annoying, annoying behavior, behavior, empty, empty seat, everyone, except, full, good, good morning, morning, next, people, right, room, seat, seats, sit, whole
You will watch an old classic movie that kind of sucks. Then, on the IMDb trivia, it says, this was the first time a film director ever pointed the camera at the sun.

4 months ago
camera, classic, classic movie, director, ever, fact, film, film director, film history, funny observation, history, IMDb, kind, movie, movie fact, movie trivia, observation, old, sucks, sun, time, trivia, watch
No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

1 month ago
401k, adulting, fear, financial, financial planning, fright, haunted, haunted house, house, humor, just, planning, year
Once again I feel like I slept in a washing machine.

1 month ago
again, comparison, exhaustion, feeling, funny feeling, humor, i, machine, sleep, tiredness, washing, washing machine

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

I’m ready to try another planet.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Getting old would be so fun if you didn’t wake up each morning with neck pain that suggests you slept hanging upside down like a bat.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

Love triangle? You mean this Dorito?

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Explain it to me like I’m 5 drinks in.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

It’s almost time to put away my black summer clothes and bring out my black fall clothes.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

I can relate to God because it also takes me a full week to finish something that still kind of sucks.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

Going viral on Telegram:

Helpful police officer reminded me he’s the one asking the questions.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I wonder how much this “Never mind, it’s only 10 bucks” has already cost me?

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I’m so lucky people can’t hear what I’m thinking.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I miss them days if you couldn’t rap, you didn’t.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

A Southerner dies every time you people type “ya’ll” instead of “y’all,” btw.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Am I the only person who hates spending the night at someone’s place? Like, we can hang out until 3 a.m., but I’m still going home.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Why did they have to bleep out everything R2D2 said?

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

But he was so nice on the prison phone calls.

Good morning to everyone except people who sit right next to you when there’s a whole room full of empty seats.

You will watch an old classic movie that kind of sucks. Then, on the IMDb trivia, it says, this was the first time a film director ever pointed the camera at the sun.

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Once again I feel like I slept in a washing machine.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

To bed then. To bed with you! Guards, take him to my bed!

I want to run through your dreams and settle in your nightmares.

I love tennis but never really been clear why they need a lifeguard.

I don’t understand people who say “I don’t know how to thank you.” Like they never heard of money.

Urgh. Trying to buy a copy of Catch-22 online but the seller won’t post it until I’ve paid and I won’t pay until I’ve received it.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Don’t put words in my mouth—that’s where the hot dogs go.

I’m at the stage in life where I stay out of arguments. Even if you say 1+1=5, you’re right. Have fun.

I drive like I’m immortal.

Fall fashion: where we all transform into stylish, toasty marshmallows!

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I’m upset that my parents never got rich enough for me to become a socialist.

Growing your own tomatoes really is the best way to devote 3 months of your life to saving $2.17.

I’ve reached that age where I don’t have to drink to forget because it just happens naturally now.

Deciding if I should heal or just give up and go completely insane.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I miss my Dad opening the windows and talking about cross-ventilation.

Kids be like: “Nice bathroom mirror. It would be a shame if I spat toothpaste all over it.”

Good things happen when you smile or when you’re naked.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Why did they have to bleep out everything R2D2 said?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

But he was so nice on the prison phone calls.

Good morning to everyone except people who sit right next to you when there’s a whole room full of empty seats.

You will watch an old classic movie that kind of sucks. Then, on the IMDb trivia, it says, this was the first time a film director ever pointed the camera at the sun.

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Once again I feel like I slept in a washing machine.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏