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201 Funny age quotes

I think I look pretty okay for my age. It’s just when I hold menus two feet from my face that I know the ruse is up.

3 months ago

At 30+, I’m like an old phone battery. Even when you charge me overnight for 10 hours, by midday I’m at 60%.

3 months ago

Remembering my youth, and a time where I could breath out of more than one nostril at once.

3 months ago

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

3 months ago

I’m at the age where I can remember things that never happened.

3 months ago

Losing weight in your 40’s: LOL!

3 months ago

They say that 50 is the new 40, but these traffic police are having none of it.

3 months ago

Age is just a number… that now takes a really long time to scroll to.

3 months ago

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

3 months ago

In my 20’s: I want to find true love. In my 40’s: I just want a toaster that gets me.

3 months ago

I’m at that age where I can no longer refer to other people as “elderly.”

3 months ago

I know I’m almost 40 because I had a few drinks last night and woke up this morning thinking: Oh no I bought so many socks online last night.

3 months ago

20’s: what even is a hangover? 40’s: puts on sunglasses to open fridge…

3 months ago

Welcome to your 40s, you now don’t understand a single word anyone under 25 is saying.

3 months ago

My back and I are definitely not the same age.

3 months ago

Welcome to middle age. You now take pictures of instructions so you can enlarge them.

3 months ago

It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.

3 months ago

If you’re 20, please stop saying you’re tired. I have bananas older than you.

3 months ago

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

3 months ago

People often mistake me for an adult because of my age.

3 months ago