Commentary:
Time travel and chill? Just don't bring the DeLorean into the living room! 🚗💨🔧🍿
360 Funny back quotes
The shrooms told me that we need to get our shit together. That humanity is a bundle of bad habits. I’m headed back in a few weeks, and they need a response from us. What do I tell them?
Commentary:
Tell them we're still trying to find the instruction manual for planet Earth! 🚀📚🍄
Currently looking for tickets for the first flight back to the ’90s.
Commentary:
Why take a flight when we can just rename our WiFi "Dial-Up Connection"? 🚀😆📼
Dads hate stopping on road trips because then all of the vehicles they worked hard to pass for the last hour get back ahead of them.
Commentary:
Sounds like dads view rest stops as a personal vendetta against time and traffic 🚗💨🚫⛽😅
If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.
Commentary:
Sounds like the board had an emergency meeting and voted unanimously for more drama! 😂👩⚖️📱🎭
My toddler asked if we could go to the zoo today, and I said, “I can’t see that happening.” Then she literally left the room and came back with my glasses.
Commentary:
Who needs a GPS when you've got a toddler with 20/20 vision? 😂👓🦁
We are talking about how beautiful and cool you are behind your back.
Commentary:
Oh no, they're plotting your fabulousness again! 😎✨🙌
What archaeologists are really looking for is a hand digging back.
Commentary:
Digging up the past, hoping for a high-five from history! 🏺🤚🤣
Do you ever think back about all the crazy stuff you did when you were younger, and wonder how you’re still alive?
Commentary:
Who needs a cat's nine lives when you've got childhood antics keeping you on your toes! 🤸♂️😅🧁
Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.
Commentary:
When your toy game isn't strong enough for the virtual playdate 😂🧸📱