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36 Funny control quotes

Trending Funny Control Quotes 🔥

Whenever I’m sad, you’re there. Whenever I have problems, you’re there. Whenever I lose control, you’re there. Let’s face it, you are bad luck.
My husband is looking for the remote control. I need everyone to stand up for a minute.
Due to foreseen circumstances well within my control I will be late.
If, I, want to, put, a comma, there, then, I will put, the comma, there.
Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.

More funny control quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”

Commentary:
Looks like someone's passion for space was out of this world, but their lunch radar was a bit off! 🚀🥪 Next time, remember: fueling your stomach is just as important as fueling rockets! Keep shooting for the stars, and maybe pack a snack for the journey. 😉
5 months ago
Share →: I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

Commentary:
🤖 "Ah, the universal remote control – the magical wand that grants us power over our TV kingdoms! It's like holding the keys to a whole new world of laziness and convenience. Say goodbye to the days of hunting down multiple remotes like a lost expedition leader!" 📺🔮
5 months ago
Share →: You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.

Commentary:
"Sorry bossy pants, but you're not in charge here – my bladder calls the shots! 💁‍♂️🚽 #BladderPower"
5 months ago
Share →: Not many quicksand-related deaths since the 1970s. Thank God the authorities got that nightmare under control.

Commentary:
Looks like quicksand finally got a grip on itself and thought, "Maybe drowning people isn't the way to go." 😅🌪️ Thank goodness for those authorities – saving lives and boots one step at a time! 🙌🏻👢 #RIPQuicksandVictims
5 months ago
Share →: I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.

Commentary:
"Ah yes, the English spelling of 'diarrhoea' truly gives the impression that your vowels are on the loose! 🤣🇬🇧 Watch out, those vowels are running wild! 🏃‍♂️💨 #LostInTranslation"
5 months ago
Share →: Whoever’s been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.

Commentary:
Looks like the weather controller decided to binge-watch some TV shows instead of doing their job! 🌦️😴 Next time, they might want to set an alarm ⏰ before they snooze off on us! #WeatherFail
5 months ago
Share →: Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.

Commentary:
"Whoops, my bad! Looks like I accidentally walked into a parenting nightmare! 🙈 Maybe stick to using their charm to sell ice cream instead? 🍦😂"
5 months ago
Share →: I’m a total go with the flow kinda person as long as the flow is meticulously scheduled well in advance and there are no mid-flow changes whatsoever.

Commentary:
"Ah, the elusive 'go with the flow' type who really just wants to control the river currents! 🌊🔄 Planning is key, spontaneity is the enemy! ⏰😅 #TypeAFlow"
5 months ago
Share →: Pleasantly surprised to discover the treadmill I bought came with a remote control, so I can run it from my recliner.

Commentary:
"Who said exercise had to be hard work? 🏃‍♂️💨 Just when you thought working out couldn't get any lazier, they add a remote control! 🛋️💪 #LegDayFromTheCouch"
5 months ago
Share →: Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am at work.

Commentary:
"Looks like even fate itself couldn't get you out of that Monday morning meeting! 🤣 #BlameItOnTheUniverse #WorkLifeWoahs"