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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Can I do better? Yes. Will I do better? Probably not.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Uninstalling Instagram can increase your IQ by 10%.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

DUI stands for: don’t Uber, I got this.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Everyone gives pleasure in some way, one when they enter a room, the other when they leave it.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

You want me to do Pilates? The thing that killed Jesus?

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

I was going to learn to play the violin, but it was too much of a commitment. I wanted something with no strings attached.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Being a dog must be wild, everyone you meet is your masseuse.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

I could never be in the mafia, those guys stay up way to late.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

4,053

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I’m sick of living through history!

Trending via TikTok:

Sorry, can’t. I took my bra off and threw it across the room an hour ago. There’s no coming back from that.

Just shared via YouTube:

Nobody told me that it takes 1-2 business days to put a snow outfit on a toddler.

Breaking via Facebook:

I’m at the age where, if you ask me to go out after 9 p.m., I’m definitely not coming.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Enjoy it now because you’re only going to get older and fatter.

Just shared via Reddit:

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

Trending via Pinterest:

Why is everyone against sugar? Who stood beside you when things went wrong and you were sad? It wasn’t lettuce, for sure.

Going viral on Twitch:

I miss them days if you couldn’t rap, you didn’t.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Relationships: Because sometimes destroying your life is a two person job.

Making waves on Slack:

“Don’t judge a book by its cover” is a beautiful, powerful sentiment that I fully ignore when book shopping.

Home » Funny Dating Quotes » Page 19

491 Funny dating quotes

More funny dating quotes 👇

I’m never single for too long, you gotta catch me while you can.

0

2 months ago

catch, confidence, dating, flirt, fun, humor, me, never, relationship, romantic, single, too
Have you noticed? When the relationship is new, the guy is never busy.

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2 months ago

busy, communication, dating, guy, never, new, noticed, relationship, romance
Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

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2 months ago

attitude, confidence, date, dating, fashion, flirtation, humor, i, joke, man, men, nonchalant, underwear, why
Every girl has a dude in her inbox talking to himself.

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2 months ago

conversation, dating, dude, every, girl, humor, inbox, self, talking, texting
Fact: WhatsApp is the most boring app if you’re single.

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2 months ago

app, boring, dating, fact, fun, loneliness, media, most, single, social, social media, WhatsApp
A DM? Flirt on the timeline like a real man.

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2 months ago

confidence, conversation, dating, DM, flirt, humor, man, media, real, social, social media, timeline
Third wheeling with two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple.

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2 months ago

awkwardness, best, couple, dating, friends, friendship, girls, humor, jealousy, much, situation, social, social situation, third, third wheel, wheel, worse
Where can one find a sugar daddy? Asking for a friend.

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2 months ago

asking, daddy, dating, friend, humor, joke, relationship, sugar, sugar daddy, where
Went on a date with a guy who didn’t ask me any questions about myself, so it’s on him when he finds out about my husband.

0

2 months ago

ask, awkward, awkward moment, conversation, date, dating, finds, guy, humor, husband, irony, me, moment, myself, questions, relationship
“You’re such a stalker!” God forbid a woman wants to know more about her future husband.

0

2 months ago

curiosity, dating, future, God, humor, husband, know, relationship, stalker, wants, woman

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Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on Reddit this month:

That uncontrollable urge to hurt myself and others when a film’s subtitles are slightly out of sync.

51 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you’re riding a bike in New York City, it means you care about your health. Riding one in Tennessee means you got a DUI.

64 shares on Reddit this month:

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

21 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I will never forget how to spell bananas, thanks to Gwen Stefani.

78 shares on Pinterest this month:

The problem is that you are in the dating pool when the other fish are in the ocean.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

Everyone you don’t like in your personal and professional life is a narcissist.

93 shares on Instagram this month:

I don’t like the person I become when I’m alone in the break room with a box of donuts.

22 shares on WhatsApp this month:

School reunion is a scam… nobody is missing anyone, they just want to know whether you have made it in life or not.

19 shares on TikTok this month:

I would really like to meet this “other candidate” who keeps taking all the jobs I’ve been applying to.

81 shares on Reddit this month:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be turning you into a poem.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Eventually, kids get old enough to see which parent was the problem.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Having now listened to the entire song, I have to say there’s some obvious internal disagreement as to what the Hokey Pokey is all about.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Why did they call it painting your toenails and not graffeeti?

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

Julia Garner most confusing name because it calls to mind both Julia Roberts and Jennifer Garner, but she is neither.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

I like people who make eye contact like they know something I don’t.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Do y’all watch the results come or do you go to bed and wait to see what Democracy Claus left you in the morning?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

The world needs to chill out. There’s no way future history teachers can cram all this nonsense into a semester.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Messenger:

Biting your tongue while eating is a perfect example of how you can still screw up, even with decades of experience.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Today marks a five year anniversary of how I’ll start going to the gym tomorrow.

Just shared via WeChat:

Puberty was a hair-raising experience.

Just landed via Threads:

My fantasy is having two men at once. One cooking, one cleaning.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

My funeral better have a bloody merch table.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh no, it’s a cop”?

Shared recently on Twitch:

My DMs are always open if you want to talk to yourself.

Spotted on Reddit:

First time buying fireworks, and I wasn’t sure I’d picked the right ones until the salesman gave me a wink and high-foured me.

Going viral on TikTok:

On my way to HR again for nicknaming my coworker “Mastercard” because they take credit for other people’s work.

Activity Log ✨

491 Funny dating quotes

More funny dating quotes 👇

All funny dating quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨