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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

have one of those big paintings with the eyeholes cut out, but I don’t have anyone to spy on, so I just watch TV through it.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

If you ever need me, I’m always just a couple missed calls and text messages away.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

When I say I like when older men tell me what to do, I am talking about Yoda and his teachings.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

My Christmas letter this year includes a bonus DVD of my colonoscopy.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

It’s so hot out here, I saw a bird blowing on a worm before he ate it.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

I heard you like bad girls. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

A lobotomy and a forehead kiss would fix everything.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Vote for me and I’ll remove all the calories from cheese.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

You want fast replies from a female? Argue with her!

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

830 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,992

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,992

2 minutes ago

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Nothing brings neighbors together like a few cops cars in front of another neighbor’s house that no one likes.

Reported on Snapchat:

If you like Christmas so much, why don’t you merry it?

Seen just now on X:

IKEA is the swedish word for “relationship meltdown in a public place.”

Making waves on Threads:

If you’re ever intimidated by someone just imagine them opening a Capri Sun.

Shared recently on Threads:

It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.

Making waves on Threads:

I keep all my valuables near the front door so if burglars breaks in during the night they will not wake me up.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

Freshly posted on Slack:

A big part of my wife’s cardio routine is rolling away from me in bed.

Broadcasted on X:

Why is it called the Super Bowl if no one is bowling?

Home » Funny Food Quotes » Page 10

733 Funny food quotes

More funny food quotes 👇

2 months ago
Share →: What if instead of Big Mac it was Big Matt and he came out and said hello to you?

Commentary:
"🤣🍔 'Hey, I'm Big Matt! Can I take your order… for friendship? 🤗💁‍♂️'"
2 months ago
Share →: Me, watching porn: they’re just going to let that pizza get cold?

Commentary:
"When your priorities are hot pizza over hot scenes! 🍕😅 #PlotTwist"
2 months ago
Share →: They can steal your recipe, but the sauce won’t taste the same.

Commentary:
"When they try to recreate your sauce but end up with ketchup soup instead! 🍅🤦‍♂️😂"
2 months ago
Share →: The way men eat when they’re single is nothing short of dehumanizing.

Commentary:
"Single men’s diet: the only food pyramid that’s actually a pile of pizza boxes! 🍕🤣"
2 months ago
Share →: People who like sweet potato fries can’t be taken seriously and deserve shame and ridicule.

Commentary:
"Sweet potato fries fans, unite! We'll be over here not being taken seriously—and still being delicious. 🍠😂 #SeriousnessIsOverrated"
2 months ago
Share →: Stretching is not enough. I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

Commentary:
I don’t need yoga—I need to be linguine’d back to life 🍝🌀😩
2 months ago
Share →: Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

Commentary:
Looks like we've just uncovered the ultimate cosmic culinary conspiracy—ground beef and sky beef fighting for top billing! 🍔☁️ Maybe next we'll have moon cheese and starfruit on the menu! 🌙🧀✨ Keep pondering the universe's beefy mysteries! 😂🌍
2 months ago
Share →: Almonds are a scam. They are wood. You are eating wood.

Commentary:
Well, looks like those fancy almonds have been lying to us all along—it's just tree’s version of a home-cooked snack! 🌰😂 Next time you crunch on one, remember you're basically gnawing on a tiny piece of tree furniture. Who knew? 🌳🤭
2 months ago
Share →: Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”

Commentary:
Well, talk about emotional baggage with your snacks! 🍇😭 Next time I munch on some grapes, I’ll wonder if I’m auditioning for a quinoa family drama. 🍇🎭 Who knew fruit could be so H O T! 🍇🔥 Stay safe, and maybe keep the grapes away from the melodramatic orchard. 😉
2 months ago
Share →: There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

Commentary:
Ah, nothing says "I love you" like sharing a Big Mac in the glow of fluorescent lighting. Who needs candlelit dinners when you’ve got fries and a side of sweet nothings? 🍟❤️😂 #FastFoodRomance #McLove

For even more funny food quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny food quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

830 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,992

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,992

2 minutes ago

3,448

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

I don’t understand how people use plastic wrap successfully.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

The thing about sleep is that I’d like to get some of it.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

We often come across people in life who make us think: “Oh look, evolution takes a break too!”

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it’s like a present from me to me.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Did you know there are people who go away for 3 days and only pack 3 days’ worth of clothing?

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

When you have the money, you can go a whole day without eating. But when you’re broke, the dizziness starts at 6 a.m.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Shampoo companies need to be clearer when they say “repairs damage”. I cancelled my therapy for nothing.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Facebook:

Remember: The first step to recovery is addiction.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

Seen just now on Reddit:

My last husband’s name is Don. I just added an E to it and walked away.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Raising a teenager is like nailing pudding to the wall.

Just landed via Discord:

You can tell a lot about someone by the stuff you make up in your head about them.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

IKEA is the swedish word for “relationship meltdown in a public place.”

Just landed via LinkedIn:

That’s not fat. It’s bonus content.

Spotted on Messenger:

You know you’re getting old when you can’t walk past a bathroom without thinking, “I may as well go while I’m here.”

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

What do you call it when everything pisses you off but you’re good at not murdering people?

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