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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

You know shit’s about to get real when I put on yoga pants before dessert.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

People remind me everyday why I prefer being on my own.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

LinkedIn: where you desperately hope that one idiot you had a drink with six years ago can somehow help get you a job.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Tested positive for needing a kiss.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

If I delete a tweet, I should disappear with it.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Girl, whatever you’re going through right now, as long as you’re not pregnant, you’re gonna be fine.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

The problem with rich people is that I am not one.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

AI won’t replace me because I’m already useless to society.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

When my friends are religious, I pretend not to notice.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,801

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

ASAP can also mean as slow as possible.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Grant me the supernatural ability to change the things I cannot accept.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Might go to prison so I can focus on the gym properly.

Shared recently on X:

When life shuts a door, open it again. It’s a door. That’s how they work.

Seen just now on Twitch:

My body is a vessel for various dips.

Going viral on TikTok:

Autumn is when men run around like it’s summer and women like it’s winter.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Monday again. I just knew this would happen.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I wish I had the free time of someone who leaves a positive Amazon review for a rake.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

My front facing camera got me looking like a failed science project.

26 Funny gardening quotes

Funny gardening quotes bring a little sunshine ☀️ and laughter 😂 to every green thumb’s day! Whether you’re battling weeds 🌱 or waiting patiently for those blooms 🌸, a witty line can turn dirt into delight. Perfect for sharing with fellow plant lovers 🌿, these quirky sayings remind us that gardening is as much about joy as it is about soil. Ready to dig into some garden giggles? Let’s grow the fun! 🌻🌼

New funny gardening quotes 👇

For even more funny gardening quotes, hit next 👇

All funny gardening quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

58 shares on TikTok this month:

Remember when tweets were like: party rocking with a mouse tonight. Piece of cheese gonna have a big bite.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

The most disturbing thing about waking up at 4 a.m. is realizing some people do this on purpose so they can exercise.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

It’s so hot out, I just hydroplaned off the toilet seat at work.

25 shares on Messenger this month:

Shoutout to my kids because they aren’t listening!

63 shares on Slack this month:

Netflix and chi…cken nuggets.

12 shares on Messenger this month:

I love when dudes are named Guy. Like, yeah. Exactly.

43 shares on Threads this month:

Better to be a wolf that everyone hates, than a donkey that everyone rides.

58 shares on YouTube this month:

Home is where you can say anything because nobody’s really listening, anyway.

43 shares on Instagram this month:

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

40 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s a beautiful morning. Lots of people out walking their phones.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

That awkward moment between birth and death.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Most divorces are caused by a spouse eating potato chips while you try to watch TV.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I like people who make eye contact like they know something I don’t.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s called a Caesar Salad because you stab it a bunch of times when you eat it.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The best part about being married is having a permanent person to debrief with immediately after any social event.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

A woman’s sigh can speak a 1000 words.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

They say “When you snooze, you lose”… I say “When you take a nappy, you are happy.”

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Is everything expensive or am I just poor?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,863

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

You can just comment, “You two look nice,” on a photo of three people. It’s free and legal.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Your coworker is not hot; they’re just within 10 feet of you 40 hours a week.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

May life treat you exactly the same way you treat servers, store clerks, senior citizens, children, and animals.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

“Are you free tomorrow?” No, tomorrow I’m still expensive.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

All of my fitness goals are within reach, but unfortunately, so are the crisps.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

In a parallel universe, I go to bed early and wake up fresh and unstoppable.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

I was raised to be humble which I excel at cause I excel at everything.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Sometimes being alive feels like being a pornstar who is asexual.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WeChat:

We put a man on the moon in 1969, and if you elect me to be your president, I promise that we will not stop until every man is on the moon.

Just shared via Reddit:

Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

Just shared via YouTube:

A single garbageman contributes more to society before lunch than every crypto trader and op-ed writer combined does in their lifetime.

Just landed via TikTok:

Welcome to your 40s! You’re gonna need several doctors, no matter how many apples.

Making waves on Slack:

Love is in the air, but so is the flu. Wash your hands!

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Coworkers are funny. You could see a guy every day for 5 years then he quits and you never see or even think about him again.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Ho, ho, holy shit is Christmas stressful.

Just landed via TikTok:

Do you ever wake up in the morning and you’re just like… no.

Going viral on Slack:

If I had a dollar for every time someone called me fat, I’d probably just spend it on more bacon.

Making waves on Facebook:

I’m already spoiled… please don’t come into my life trying to unspoil me.

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