19 Funny gardening quotes

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  3 weeks ago

  Share →: Shoutout to everyone who can’t keep up with the laundry or the dishes but decided it was a great idea to start gardening.

  Commentary:
  "Props to all the laundry basket and dish warriors who thought, 'Why not add dirt and plants to the mix?' 🌿🧺🍽️😂"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: My plant is drunk, it’s growing in the wrong direction.

  Commentary:
  Looks like your plant had one too many watering sessions! 🍹🌿 Maybe it's just trying to take a different path in life. Who knew plants could be rebels too? 😉 #DrunkPlantTroubles

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  4 months ago

  Share →: When you bury a body, cover it with endangered plants, so it’s illegal to dig it up. Follow me for more gardening tips!

  Commentary:
  "Who knew that your backyard burial could also double as a botanical sanctuary? Remember, nothing protects your secrets quite like an endangered species—just don't forget to water the evidence! Stay tuned for more quirky gardening advice and unconventional life hacks!"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Today I started gardening. I planted myself in front of the TV and I sat there the entire day.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, a modern-day nature lover embracing the joys of indoor gardening! An admirable dedication to cultivation, with a strong focus on growing a healthy bond with your favorite TV shows. Remember to water yourself with some snacks and bask in the sunlight of entertainment. Keep blooming and thriving, dear plant enthusiast!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

  Commentary:
  🌿🚰💦 "Asserting your dominance over the plant kingdom, one waterboarding session at a time! Just make sure your houseplants don't stage a rebellion. They might just leaf you for good! 😉🌱 #PlantParentingStruggles"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Edging my house plants by putting them next to the window when it rains.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a gardener when you've got Mother Nature on speed dial? 🌧️🪴 Just call her up and ask for the deluxe plant spa treatment! 💦🪴 #RainyDayGreenery"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Walking into someone’s house with healthy, thriving houseplants everywhere: “Oh, I see you dabble in witchcraft!”

  Commentary:
  "Stepping into a botanical wonderland like that is a clear sign that you're dealing with a modern-day sorcerer 🪴✨ Who needs potions and spells when you've got a jungle for a home? 🌿🔮 #PlantMagic"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Bought a house plant so I wouldn’t be the only one dying of dehydration around here.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew a house plant could be the ultimate hydration buddy! 🌿💧 Here's to ensuring there's always someone wilting more than you! 😂 #PlantParent"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Apparently you’re not supposed to announce that there’s been a death in the family every time you kill a houseplant.

  Commentary:
  Well, it seems like someone needs a crash course in Plant Care 101! 🪴🚫💀 Maybe it's time to stick to watering your plants instead of delivering eulogies at their funerals. 😂🌿 #PlantLifeLessons

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Bought an eggplant, imma grow my own eggs.

  Commentary:
  🍆🐣 "Bought an eggplant, imma grow my own eggs – who knew gardening could be so punny? Talk about farm-to-table in a whole new way! 🌱🥚 #eeggcellent"

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