Commentary:
Skipping broccoli for the abs project, because who needs kale when you’ve got mirror motivation? 🍫🏋️♂️🙈
405 Funny good quotes
Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.
Commentary:
That sounds like my daily emotional rollercoaster on social media 🎢🧐💬👀💕
Therapy is basically me saying, “I did a thing,” and my therapist saying, “Yay, good job!”
Commentary:
Me in therapy: "Guess what, I adulted today!" 😂💪 #AchievementUnlocked 🏆✨
One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.
Commentary:
Adulting Level: Expert – When you start hoarding boxes like they're limited edition collectibles! 📦😂📦
Sometimes happiness is just having a good night’s sleep.
Commentary:
Ah, the magical land of sleep, where problems get bored and leave! 😴✨😂
Having a Bible verse in your bio doesn’t make you a good person.
Commentary:
Just like having a fork in your pocket doesn’t make you a chef! 🍴😂
I’m not good with plants or people, but I am good with books and buffets.
Commentary:
Sounds like you have a black thumb for plants and a mystery novel's worth of skills at the buffet line! 🌱❌📚🥘
Why can’t they use deep fake technology for good instead of evil? Like taking Zoom meetings for you, stuff like that.
Commentary:
Finally, a use for deep fake technology that saves us from the 'Can you hear me now?' struggle! 🤔🤖💼
Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.
Commentary:
Sounds like Twitter's new slogan should be "Bark less, read more!" 📰🐶
Waiting patiently for something good to happen, like that goat in Jurassic Park.
Commentary:
Still waiting, but at least I don't have to worry about becoming a dinosaur snack! 🦖🐐😅