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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

If you get bitten by a snake and you’re not sure if it was poisonous, simply wait to see if you die or not. That should give you your answer.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Friendly reminder to drink your water and mind your business this week.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

Don’t be part of the problem. Be all of it.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

Dear music, thanks!

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Think like a crazy person, and then you’ll understand.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

If you encounter a teenager out in the wild, be kind. They are the first generation of kids whose parents are cooler than they are.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, please put some money in its pocket.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

If you order a pizza with veggies on it, you can tell people you had a salad.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,688

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

There is certainly no life on other planets. Otherwise our government would have sent money there long ago.

Just shared via Discord:

When I was young I fixed my parents’ computer and now that I’m older I fix computers for my kids. Are we the only generation that knows how computers work?

Trending via YouTube:

What can I buy my wife for Valentine’s Day that finally proves to her once and for all that I have absolutely no idea what she likes or who she is?

Spotted on Telegram:

If you start liking someone, just block them. Follow me for more relationship advice.

Shared recently on Threads:

Y’all ever skip a class and then have the post-skip class depression? Like, damn, I should’ve just gone.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I love being single because how could I explain a 2 p.m. – 5 p.m. nap on a Saturday.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Everyone hates on the dentist but at least they don’t try to weigh you.

Trending via Threads:

The baddest women come into your life when you have 37 dollars left.

Just shared via Twitch:

People who take two steps on the stairs are both active and lazy at the same time.

Going viral on Twitch:

Why procrastinate now when you can always procrastinate later?

Home » Funny Joke Quotes » Page 152

1560 Funny joke quotes

More funny joke quotes 👇

I was telling my sister that I’ve been going to the gym recently, and my nephew said, “You should go inside when you get there,” and I don’t think I’ll ever recover from that.

0

5 months ago

ever, family, going, gym, humor, i, inside, joke, misunderstanding, nephew, recover, said, should, sister, telling, think
Horror movies should add bloopers, so after watching the main film, you’ll be able to sleep.

0

5 months ago

able, add, after, blooper, bloopers, comedy, film, horror, horror movie, joke, main, movie, scare, should, sleep, watching
They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.

0

5 months ago

anyone, appropriation, cultural, cultural appropriation, culture, dog, else, gender, gender reveal, got, humor, i, invited, joke, just, own, party, people, reveal, say, white, white culture
I lied, there is no sex. You’re helping me repot plants.

0

5 months ago

excuse, gardening, helping, humor, i, joke, lie, me, plant, plants, relationship, repot, sex
AI could never steal company time the way I do.

0

5 months ago

AI, company, company time, humor, i, joke, never, productivity, steal, time, work
Whoever said, “Laughter is the best medicine,” clearly never tried Revenge.

0

5 months ago

best, humor, joke, laughter, medicine, never, revenge, said, saying, tried
Fasted for 72 hours and gained the ability to whisper to bats.

0

5 months ago

72, 72 hours, ability, bat, bats, fasting, hours, humor, joke, superpower, whisper
IP address? You mean the bathroom?

0

5 months ago

address, bathroom, humor, ip, IP address, joke, mean, misunderstanding, technology
Opening a bakery and calling it “I’m a crepe. I’m a weird dough.”

0

5 months ago

bakery, calling, crepe, dough, food, food joke, humor, joke, opening, pun, weird
If I wore a mood ring, it would probably explode immediately.

0

5 months ago

emotional, explode, explosion, humor, i, joke, mood, mood ring, personality, ring

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Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Being an adult is mumbling ‘this is stupid’ as you reluctantly slide out of bed.

40 shares on TikTok this month:

If I’m reading my Twitter feed correctly, Jennifer Aniston killed JFK.

52 shares on X this month:

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

20 shares on Slack this month:

Instead of hairstyles and make-up, there should be YouTube tutorials on polite behavior.

20 shares on Messenger this month:

For Christmas, I’d like to figure it all out.

37 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

34 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I miss when 1K was a lot of money.

42 shares on Snapchat this month:

I appreciate the interest, but I’m officially removing myself from the running to be the next James Bond. Thank you for your understanding.

28 shares on Reddit this month:

Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

32 shares on Facebook this month:

Is the elephant in the room with us right now?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

I tried to walk like an Egyptian and now I need to see a Cairo practor.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

If you think my heart is cold, you should feel my feet.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Relationship so bad you start relating to Taylor Swift songs.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Dear brain, please finally learn the difference between hunger and boredom. I’m getting fat.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Went to HR to complain about my coworkers but my mom said she can’t fire my kids.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

I love tennis but never really been clear why they need a lifeguard.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’m so sick of TV shows and movies where there are no likable characters. I don’t need to spend an hour with people I hate, I already have my life.

Shared recently on Messenger:

How is it still this week?

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Oh, you’re extending your sale? Your Black Friday sale that ended on Tuesday? You’re extending it?

Making waves on YouTube:

Solitude never hits you with unsolicited opinions.

Trending via Instagram:

Baby, no job is ever that serious for you to be a work snitch.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

If you’re a mad scientist, put a note in your laboratory reminding you to sometimes be a happy scientist.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Hit the vape till it tastes like technology.

Just landed via Slack:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

Seen just now on Facebook:

If you’re in first class on a flight, sometimes they upgrade you to captain.

Activity Log ✨

1560 Funny joke quotes

More funny joke quotes 👇

All funny joke quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨