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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

I’m going to try and be less of a people pleaser, is everyone ok with that?

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Do y’all ever get pre-annoyed? Like, you already know someone is about to piss you off.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

Whoever said it was okay to let your pets sleep in your bed, thanks a lot, now my goldfish is dead.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Cookbook, but each recipe includes a photo of all the dishes that need to be cleaned after making it.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

It’s so much easier to suggest solutions when you don’t know too much about the problem.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Don’t worry, you’ll find the lost scissors when you’ll be searching for your glasses.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Adulthood is basically just trying to fall asleep at night and stay awake during the day.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

I just think we should kiss. And kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss. But that’s just me.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Some people are wise; some are otherwise.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,986

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Threads:

“Topless” doesn’t always mean breasts or a convertible. Sometimes it also means the brain.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Could you set a lightsaber on low and use it as a back scratcher?

Seen just now on YouTube:

I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

Just shared via Facebook:

What are some beginner bad habits for someone just getting into ruining their life?

Going viral on TikTok:

Just drafted the drunk text I’m going to send after one drink this weekend.

Going viral on Twitch:

I know life can be tough, but you still gotta wear deodorant.

Just landed via YouTube:

You want me to do Pilates? The thing that killed Jesus?

Trending via Snapchat:

I’m a “I have an appointment later, so I can’t do anything else for the rest of the day” kind of person.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I’m perfectly approachable as long as you’re carrying a plate of nachos.

Trending via Pinterest:

A car window made specifically for a dog to stick its head out of is called a sunwoof.

16 Funny lottery quotes

Funny lottery quotes bring a playful twist to the high-stakes world of dreams and luck! 🎉💸 From whimsical musings on the improbability of hitting the jackpot to humorous takes on the fantasy of becoming an overnight millionaire, these quotes offer a lighthearted perspective on the lottery experience. Enjoy a laugh and embrace the fun side of dreaming big! 😄🎟️

New funny lottery quotes 👇

For even more funny lottery quotes, hit next 👇

All funny lottery quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

59 shares on Instagram this month:

The quality of clothing at retail stores today is quite literally the quality that Halloween costumes used to be.

18 shares on Facebook this month:

Staying up all night so I don’t miss any good posts.

93 shares on TikTok this month:

Losing and then immediately gaining weight is my superpower.

92 shares on Instagram this month:

I didn’t really feel old until my doctor hit me with the “at your age…”

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

The lion does not concern himself with the few small drops of pee that got on his boxers at the urinal even after he did a few shakes to be sure.

16 shares on Threads this month:

My new phone is being delivered by Amazon, which means that I can track its movements for a day before it tracks mine for five years.

44 shares on Twitch this month:

Did you know that if you listen to any Black Sabbath album backwards, you can hear them singing backwards?

67 shares on Facebook this month:

How do you text “okay” but in the rudest way possible?

13 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You don’t become cooler with age, but you do care progressively less about being cool, which is the only true way of being cool. This is called the Geezer’s Paradox.

23 shares on X this month:

I’m so old that when I take a walk down memory lane, I get lost.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Lack of sex really gets you mad at every little thing for no reason.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite emails are the ones that say your order has shipped.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Women love deciding to never talk to you again, and actually do it.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t listen to any thoughts about yourself if your hair isn’t washed. It’s just not true.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

One thing that sucks about being grown-up is not being able to say, “My mom said no,” when you don’t want someone to come over.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The thief who stole my iPhone could face time.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re like if “nope” was a person.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

That “meeting canceled” ping is a gift from the Gods.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Wearing a condom while she’s on birth control is called two-factor authentication.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s hard dating someone who has been single for a long time. Any slight inconvenience, and they’ll crawl back into their peaceful abode. No stress.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,604

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

How to write complaints: “Dear customer service, first of all, you should know that I am typing this with my middle finger.”

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Accordion to a recent survey, inserting musical instruments into sentences largely goes unnoticed.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

She left me because of my poor English. But I doesn’t care.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Once you’ve been single for a long time, you realize how exhausting relationships can be.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

I only sleep so my phone can get the night off.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Moment of silence for those who received mugs that aren’t microwave- and dishwasher-safe.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

If you like constant interruptions when you’re trying to get something done, then parenting might be for you.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

Trending via Discord:

Sometimes it’s the conversations you have with yourself that take the longest.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

Seen just now on YouTube:

A little mischievousness is good for the soul.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I wish it were social acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away mid conversation when you’re bored.

Shared recently on TikTok:

As you get older, it’s amazing how fast bird-watching creeps up on you…

Going viral on Telegram:

Public transportation is great, but they should invent a type where it’s only me in the vehicle.

Spotted on WeChat:

Let’s hope those bridges you burn keep you warm at night.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Why does the weekend always feel like it lasts five minutes?

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

A McRib killed my tapeworm.

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