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49 Funny politics quotes

Funny politics quotes add a light-hearted twist to the often serious world of government and power! πŸ—³οΈπŸ˜‚ Whether you’re poking fun at politicians or finding humor in policy mishaps, these quotes offer a fresh, witty perspective on the political landscape. Get ready for a laugh with a dash of satire! πŸ˜„πŸŽ‰

There’s only one way we’ll at least occasionally get normal elected officials and that’s if we pick them by random lottery.

3 months ago

If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

3 months ago

When I’m president, everyone who listens to techno, house or rap will be allowed to drive a little faster than others.

3 months ago

When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

3 months ago

So far, no one has seriously tried to bribe me, which is a shame because I am extremely corrupt. Maybe I need a position with more power.

3 months ago

I want a president who promises no jobs. I don’t want to have a job.

3 months ago

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

3 months ago

There are two types of people in politics. Avoid them.

3 months ago

Vote for me and I’ll remove all the calories from cheese.

3 months ago

Vote for me and I will halve the calories in chocolate.

3 months ago

Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.

3 months ago

Lying to stupid people can give you a profound sense of satisfaction, it can also make you president.

3 months ago

If you’re lost in the woods, start talking loudly about politics. Someone will come to argue with you.

3 months ago

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

3 months ago

The two most popular things to do on the internet are arguing about politics and looking at naked people. Million dollar website idea: combine both β€” naked people arguing about politics.

3 months ago

Politics top tip: Gain people’s trust by telling them that everyone is lying to them.

3 months ago

As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

3 months ago

I disagree with my politics.

3 months ago

β€œI don’t do politics.” Politics will do you, my brother and sister. Politics will do you like mad.

3 months ago

Introducing two cats is tedium. Not interested in your dumb politics just lick each other and be normal already.

3 months ago