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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

So we have actual fact checkers who know all the facts? Why not create a TV channel where they just give us the facts? We could call it the News.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Rudolph’s bright red nose would not have done anything to improve Santa’s visibility in dense fog.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

The only reason I haven’t gone crazy yet is because I’m just too lazy.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

If I learned anything in college, it’s that pepper spray only stings for a couple hours.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

My neighbors were up shouting all night. I could barely hear my bagpipes.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Whole crypto scheme is built on people too dumb for crypto that aren’t self-aware enough to realize it.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

“I’m too pretty for this” is a very valid excuse, actually.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

“Winter is literally the best season.” Okay, husky, go sit outside then.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,500

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Going viral on Messenger:

But if i put my laundry away, the laundry chair will be out of a job.

Trending via TikTok:

I’m often mistaken for an adult because of my age.

Spotted on Discord:

Gambling is all about getting something for nothing and spending thousands of dollars trying to do it.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

You can always gauge my mood by the type of animal videos I share: sweet puppy videos or a cat smacking the shit out of someone.

Just shared via YouTube:

Warning: not watching the news may lead to a heightened sense of joy, security, and optimism.

Trending via Slack:

I’m going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life. l’ll call it my oughtabiography.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Seeing a BBL in real life is a reality-altering experience.

Spotted on Discord:

The first bowl of cereal makes you want a second, but the second makes you wish you stopped at the first.

Trending via TikTok:

Everyone’s worried about a recession, but babes, we’re heading for a dark age.

38 Funny seasonal quotes

More funny seasonal quotes 👇

November doesn’t have afternoons. It’s just morning until 2 p.m., then night.

3 months ago

2, afternoon, daylight, funny observation, humor, just, morning, night, November, observation, seasonal, time, winter
Going from summer clothes to winter clothes: “Okay!” Going from winter clothes to summer clothes: “I AM NOT READY!”

3 months ago

am, change, clothes, clothing, clothing struggle, going, humor, i, okay, readiness, ready, season, season change, seasonal, seasonal humor, struggle, summer, summer clothes, transition, weather, weather transition, winter, winter clothes
Would pay $10 a month for Summer Premium Package without wasps.

3 months ago

activity, humor, month, outdoor, outdoor activity, package, pay, premium, premium package, seasonal, subscription, summer, wasp
I can’t believe Halloween was 10 pounds ago.

3 months ago

believe, celebration, diet, Halloween, humor, i, pounds, seasonal, time, weight
Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

3 months ago

coffee, cold, cold weather, dark, days, drink, hibernation, humor, morning, morning routine, routine, seasonal, seasonal humor, short, short days, weather, winter
Don’t forget to set your clocks back to seasonal depression this weekend.

3 months ago

autumn, back, change, clock, clock change, clocks, daylight, daylight saving, depression, fall, forget, health, humor, joke, mental, mental health, saving, seasonal, seasonal depression, set, time, weekend
Mud season creeps up on us every year, destroying hearts and minds as well as light grey carpeting.

3 months ago

carpeting, change, destruction, grey, hearts, humor, light, light grey, minds, mud, mud season, season, seasonal, seasonal change, well, year
Painted all of my red flags orange for fall.

3 months ago

fall, flag, humor, orange, paint, red, red flag, relationship, seasonal, sign, warning, warning sign

For even more funny seasonal quotes, hit next 👇

All funny seasonal quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

85 shares on YouTube this month:

Imagine playing Truth or Dare and they dare you to go home.

18 shares on Twitch this month:

Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.

23 shares on TikTok this month:

The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Holiday dinners with family are like real life boss levels with the worst loot.

27 shares on Reddit this month:

At the Pride and Prejudice showing booing whenever Prejudice comes on screen.

54 shares on Telegram this month:

Y’all ever withheld good news so that it remains untouched by negativity?

52 shares on Reddit this month:

I accidentally hit a parked car, so I left them a note that said “next time it will be you”.

70 shares on Discord this month:

I’m going to sleep. Anyone want anything?

72 shares on X this month:

Lost another rap battle by just agreeing with everything the other guy said.

66 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m so old, I still keep special moments in my heart and not in my Insta story.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Things I hate about group work: The group.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

The two types of video games are kill everything that moves and Microsoft Excel.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

I like to begin every day by looking forward to the end of the day.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

My tween would like you to know I ruined his life when I told him to stop being super sus and cringe and be more lit yo.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Had the bed all to myself last night, so you know what that means… I slept in a slightly different spot, and now my neck feels weird.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

I’m not even a 2nd choice, I’m like an 8th choice, sometimes a 10th.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Women don’t pretend anymore to dig for something in their purse and then pull out their middle finger.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

Aura farming in front of old people by not listening to music nor checking my phone.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Wow, you have a very impressive collection of strange tendencies.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

They’re called grown-ups because they groan every time they get up.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Breaking via YouTube:

Turns out the honeymoon phase lasts forever when you pick the right partner.

Trending via Threads:

Imagine falling in love with me then finding out I’m a slow walker.

Trending via WeChat:

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

Spotted on TikTok:

One day you’ll find someone obsessed with you. It’s probably going to be a squirrel.

Shared recently on Instagram:

If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.

Breaking via Messenger:

If I text you an accordion emoji, it means you better start acting accordingly.

Going viral on Telegram:

Anyone who doesn’t like me snoring, doesn’t deserve me moaning either.

Spotted on Discord:

Eating spaghetti to forgetti my regretti.

Just landed via TikTok:

Memories are a bit fuzzy – but regrets? They’re in 8K and Dolby Vision.

Activity Log ✨

38 Funny seasonal quotes

More funny seasonal quotes 👇

All funny seasonal quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨