455 funny think quotes - Page 3 - Wordgag

I actually think my version of the lyrics makes more sense.

May 28, 2026

If you think I’m funny, you should hear the voices in my head.

May 28, 2026

I’m gonna dress how I want this summer, and if you think I’m fat, well, so do I.

May 28, 2026

“What’s your 5-year plan?” I’ll probably go to the movies next week, I think.

May 28, 2026

And then the vodka whispered, “Say what you really think.”

May 28, 2026

I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.

May 28, 2026

Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

May 28, 2026

Do you all introverts ever open a text and think, ‘I’ll reply when I have the energy,’ and then it’s three weeks, and you have to live with the guilt of being a horrible friend.

May 28, 2026

Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

May 28, 2026

I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.

May 28, 2026

I think we should all try to spend more time online. It seems to be helping society.

May 28, 2026

I think my type is a nice person.

May 28, 2026

I wonder how many people think, “What the hell?” after talking to me.

May 28, 2026

I don’t think we’ll ever see aliens. I bet that they’re just gathering information and waiting for us to destroy ourselves.

May 28, 2026

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

May 28, 2026

My problem is I always think I can get ready in 15 minutes when I have repeatedly proven that I can’t.

May 28, 2026

Remember those days when you missed school and you’d check the time and think, “They’re eating right now.”

May 28, 2026

I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

May 27, 2026

Most people think that I’m arrogant, but who cares what peasants think.

May 27, 2026

I think God was high when he made me.

May 27, 2026

Think I’ll get high enough to find out if there’s a God. Stay tuned.

May 27, 2026

Think like a crazy person, and then you’ll understand.

May 27, 2026

Not having a crush is dangerous. What am I supposed to think about? What if I invent something?

May 27, 2026

Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

May 27, 2026

People will say stuff like “Well, at least if WWIII happens, I won’t have to go to work…” I think in your heart you know that’s not true.

May 27, 2026

If you think my posts are horrid, wait until you see the live stream of my colonoscopy.

May 27, 2026

Adding “Free HBO” to your dating profile isn’t the game changer you’d think it’d be.

May 27, 2026

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

May 27, 2026

Given the amount of clowns around here, you’d think it would be more entertaining.

May 27, 2026

I think airplanes would be way cooler if the wings flapped like a bird.

May 27, 2026

A couple of birds are outside fighting. Wait. They’ve quieted down. There’s a third bird. I think he may be their therapist.

May 27, 2026

I really think tossing and turning at night should be counted as exercise.

May 27, 2026

I never thought I would say this, and it took me a while to come to terms, but I think I ate too much bacon.

May 27, 2026

I think the Monday after Sunday should always be a day off.

May 27, 2026

I think you misunderstood – when I said, “Let me look into it,” that meant, “I don’t know exactly how to tell you no just yet.”

May 27, 2026

Do you think birds, once they get older, start people-watching?

May 27, 2026

The earlier you wake up, the more time you have to think about why you wish you were still asleep in bed.

May 27, 2026

If I sing “Hello” and you think of “Lionel Richie” and not “Adele,” then you can probably predict the weather with one of your knees.

May 27, 2026

I really think my coworkers and I deserve an Oscar for acting like everything at work is fine.

May 27, 2026

I know it hurts like hell, and you don’t think you can do it, but it’s just one push-up.

May 27, 2026