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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡² has downloaded:

Stealing hoodies is for amateurs. Steal his car like a real woman.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ή has viewed:

Men will ruin your whole life then come back and like your story.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ό has shared:

Going to the gym to exercise my demons.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡Ό has shared:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡΄ has copied:

That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don’t know whether to get dressed or fake an illness.

Someone from πŸ‡΄πŸ‡² has downloaded:

Most divorces are caused by a spouse eating potato chips while you try to watch TV.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Έ has shared:

Sure, I could keep my thoughts to myself but I can’t see β€œLikes” in my journal.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡¦ has bookmarked:

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡· has viewed:

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡¬ has shared:

Life would be so much easier if the nose of people who lie all the time did actually grow longer like Pinocchio’s.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

10 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Freshly posted on TikTok:

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my ID photo.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

If I sing “Hello” and you think of “Lionel Richie” and not “Adele,” then you can probably predict the weather with one of your knees.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I’m not asking for a lot, I just want someone down to earth that’s gonna touch me all over like my shower curtain does.

Shared recently on Threads:

It’s important to get out of the house every once and a while to remind yourself of why you don’t go out.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Spotted on Pinterest:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.

Making waves on Instagram:

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

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18 Funny wifi quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

10 minutes ago

Users Online

3,449

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡Ύ has downloaded:

If PokΓ©mon were real, state fairs would serve them deep fried on a stick.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡° has copied:

My anti-theft device in my car is that it’s manual.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡± has viewed:

If i say β€œmorning!” to you, it does not mean β€œgood morning”, I am merely exclaiming in horror that it is morning.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡² has viewed:

I’m accused of being a plagiarist. Their words, not mine.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡¦ has downloaded:

I’m pretty sure by now that we’re some kind of satire channel on some other planet.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡³ has downloaded:

It’s time I admit something: Sometimes, when I say good night, I don’t actually go to bed right away.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡² has shared:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ό has copied:

If you tell lies about me, I’ll tell the truth about you.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡© has bookmarked:

My front facing camera got me looking like a failed science project.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡² has downloaded:

I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn. It’s dead yarn now though.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Freshly posted on Slack:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, please make it study.

Making waves on Discord:

McDonald’s only giving me 9 Chicken Nuggets instead of 10 is how my villain origin story began.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

A moth is just a butterfly with glasses and its hair up.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Seen just now on Discord:

Not going is the new leaving early.

Spotted on Threads:

The urge to pee in the morning is so aggressive. Bro, like, chill we’re getting there. Don’t threaten to come out.

Trending via Pinterest:

Gonna start using β€œwith all dude respect”.

Live now on Pinterest:

Roses are red, I’m staying in bed. I’ve made no plans, besides pretending I’m dead.

Just shared via Telegram:

My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it’s like a circus in my head.

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