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Commentary:
"Who needs a boring old slide when you can have a dinosaur ride to wrap up the day?! 🦕 Just imagine the looks on your coworkers' faces as you cruise past them in style! Definitely an epic way to end the workday, for sure! 😂"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

1 month ago
back, days, dinosaurs, exercise, good, good old days, humor, just, naturally, nature, nostalgia, old, prehistoric, running, toenails, trim
Thanksgiving and Christmas should be six months apart. Absurd to see those people again so soon. Insane.

5 days ago
absurd, again, apart, Christmas, family, holiday, holiday season, humor, insane, months, people, reunion, season, should, six, socializing, soon, Thanksgiving, timing
I respect perfume commercials being like we can’t show you a smell mind if we just go insane for 30 seconds.

1 month ago
30, advertising, being, commercial, commercials, creativity, humor, i, insane, insanity, just, mind, perception, perfume, respect, seconds, show, smell
The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

1 month ago
beauty, beauty product, cosmetics, discontinued, favorite, first-world, first-world problem, frustration, having, lover, makeup, makeup lover, problem, product
I’ll marry your mom just so I can ground you.

1 month ago
ground, humor, i, just, marry, mom, parent, relationship
If you did the weekend right, your coffee needs coffee today.

1 month ago
caffeine, coffee, exhaustion, hangover, humor, needs, productivity, recovery, right, today, weekend

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

I wish my midlife crisis made me want to get a gym membership and a revenge body, but instead I’m eating Snickers for breakfast in bed.

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How many times does one have to open the fridge door before cake appears inside?

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I started my diet 2 hours ago, I’m glad that’s over.

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If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

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You don’t have to check your Spotify Wrapped, you are the most played this year.

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My doctor just diagnosed me with anxiety and constipation. Now I’m worried shitless.

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Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

Mayor of a small town is such a wild job. It’s like being the president of a country where you went to high school with the whole population.

Spreading quickly via X:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Nothing ruins my day quite like getting out of bed and dealing with people.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Grandparents are there to help the kids get into trouble and teach them stupid things they wouldn’t think of on their own.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

On my way to HR again for nicknaming my coworker “Mastercard” because they take credit for other people’s work.

Just shared via Slack:

It’s like 10,000 Tupperwares when all you need is a lid.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Eating trail mix should count as hiking.

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Activity Log ✨

Just once I wanna slide down a dinosaur at the end of my workday, is that too much to ask for?

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

Thanksgiving and Christmas should be six months apart. Absurd to see those people again so soon. Insane.

I respect perfume commercials being like we can’t show you a smell mind if we just go insane for 30 seconds.

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

I’ll marry your mom just so I can ground you.

If you did the weekend right, your coffee needs coffee today.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I miss having that butterfly feeling. People give me roach vibes at this point.

Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

A little time spent not acting your age is never a bad thing.

I’m just falling in love with my problems now. Maybe they’ll leave me too.

Why can’t they use deep fake technology for good instead of evil? Like taking Zoom meetings for you, stuff like that.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I avoid those club cameras like my life depends on it.

Getting a boner because the Lego instructions are telling me what to do.

Babe, are you okay? You haven’t touched your dark humor all day.

Making her wear those remote-controlled vibrating panties in public so I can inform her when I’m tired and want to leave the party.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

The goose: Canada’s most violent saxophone.

I’m too lazy to be a superhero. If I had laser eyes, I’d probably just use them to heat soup or something.

Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

How long does it take for an apple to turn brown after you cut it? Never mind.

If the line at the grocery store takes longer than 10 minutes, the candy beside the checkout should be free.

Opposites often not only attract each other, they often also undress each other.

The first Saw movie should have been called Footloose.

Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.

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Just once I wanna slide down a dinosaur at the end of my workday, is that too much to ask for?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

Thanksgiving and Christmas should be six months apart. Absurd to see those people again so soon. Insane.

I respect perfume commercials being like we can’t show you a smell mind if we just go insane for 30 seconds.

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

I’ll marry your mom just so I can ground you.

If you did the weekend right, your coffee needs coffee today.

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