Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

The way people who are really into each other look moments before kissing is so hot. It’s like seeing a glimpse of cannibalism.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

It doesn’t matter how bizarre your situation is. Somebody on Reddit already been there, done that.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

I’ve found that the easiest way to do burpees is to just not do burpees. No pain, no pain.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Mood to play music louder than my thoughts.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Being excited to get in bed is a different level of adulting.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

If you think I’m annoying, give it some time. You’ll know for sure pretty soon.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Can somebody explain to me why it’s bad if immigrants take our jobs, but it’s good if AI does?

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

My wife just pulled me into the other room, and I thought she wanted to have a serious talk, but she just wanted to give me M&M’s without the kids seeing.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Scratching the mosquito bite on my foot? Literally orgasmic. This is the kind of stuff that the government doesn’t want you to know.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

Does everyone’s inner monologue have a laugh track?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

3,697

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

One thing that sucks about being grown-up is not being able to say, “My mom said no,” when you don’t want someone to come over.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

Making waves on WeChat:

The lion does not concern himself with the check engine light.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Nothing ruins my day quite like getting out of bed and dealing with people.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Introverts be like “I know a place”, then go home.

Just landed via X:

Girl who is still crazy: I was crazy back then.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Are you http? Because I’m :// without you.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Two sheep walk into a baaaaa.

Breaking via Facebook:

Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Imagine if every time you stepped into an elevator, it played the “Mission Impossible” theme.

More funny quotes 👇

I know life can be tough, but you still gotta wear deodorant.

0

5 months ago

advice, deodorant, humor, hygiene, i, know, life, situation, still, tough, tough situation, wear
“Normalize this, normalize that.” How about y’all feel shame for once?

0

5 months ago

commentary, feel, humor, normalize, once, sarcasm, shame, social, social commentary
Vacations are expensive, but how else could you put a price tag on your kids being ungrateful in a different city.

0

5 months ago

being, city, different, else, expense, expensive, family, humor, kid, kids, parenting, price, price tag, put, tag, travel, ungrateful, vacation
Plot twist: the universe is waiting for you to give it a sign.

0

5 months ago

give, humor, plot, plot twist, sign, twist, universe, waiting
Sorry, I ghosted you. I just felt like you were gonna ghost me, so I did it first.

0

5 months ago

apology, communication, ghost, ghosted, ghosting, humor, i, interaction, just, me, relationship, social, social interaction, sorry
Ripping the fishnets off my slutty little oranges.

0

5 months ago

cheeky, fishnet, humor, little, orange, oranges, playful, ripping, slutty
Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

0

5 months ago

artist, artists, band, big, calling, fan, humor, last, music, name, nickname
No, you don’t understand. This is my special mistake. I keep making it because it is very dear to me, like an old friend.

0

5 months ago

affection, flaw, friend, friendship, humor, i, keep, love, making, me, mistake, old, old friend, personal, personal flaw, repetition, special, special mistake, understand
An escape room, but it’s just your thoughts. Good luck.

0

5 months ago

challenge, escape, escape room, game, good, humor, just, luck, mental, mental game, mind, room, thought, thoughts
Guilty pleasure? Why would I ever feel guilty about pleasure.

0

5 months ago

acceptance, ever, feel, guilt, guilty, guilty pleasure, humor, i, pleasure, self, self-acceptance, why

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on X this month:

I’ve left my past behind me, so if I owe you money, sorry, I’ve left it behind me.

47 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Why is there so much day left at the end of my energy?

31 shares on Pinterest this month:

Me drinking green tea: this is going to fix everything.

10 shares on Threads this month:

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

30 shares on Slack this month:

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

72 shares on Threads this month:

I find myself thinking “God, I need a cigarette” way too often for someone who doesn’t actually smoke.

71 shares on Reddit this month:

She poured the milk before the cereal. It was not meant to be.

27 shares on WeChat this month:

You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.

50 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m really looking forward to another exciting year staring at my phone.

18 shares on Threads this month:

Girls Just Want To Have Naan

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Striking gold in your 40s: finding a close parking spot that’s in the shade on a hot summer day.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Despite removing all the stains, I still lost my job as a church window cleaner.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

What part of “I don’t want to spend any more money” don’t I understand?

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

All day I think about sleep but when it’s time to go to bed I don’t wanna.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Never in my life have I heard my dad sneeze at an acceptable volume.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Apparently the thirstiest creature in the whole world is always a kid who’s been told to go back to his bed like a hundred times.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’

Social Media Log 💫

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Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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