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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

Getting into male-dominated fields like falling asleep on the couch.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Don’t be fooled by what your kids will eat at someone else’s house.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

I keep saying, “It is what it is,” but what even is it?

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

The biggest difference between my toddler and me is that if I had poop on my butt, that’d be priority #1.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Life tip: if nothing goes right, go to sleep.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Before Google, if you didn’t know something you had to go ask someone and most of the time they couldn’t help you, and now that’s also how Google works.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Honk shuah. Sleep on that thang!

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,417

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

A camel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, you can’t bring your own drinks in here!”

Just landed via Facebook:

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

Shared recently on YouTube:

The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

If all men are the same, why does it take women so long to choose one?

Breaking via Slack:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Going viral on Facebook:

Take me back to the night we met so I can never give you a chance.

Just shared via Telegram:

I wear sunglasses when I’m driving so nobody knows I’m asleep.

Making waves on TikTok:

Being a sleepy girl with a busy life is so hard.

Making waves on Discord:

A moment of silence for everything I have to do but am not doing.

Making waves on Facebook:

“You’re under the weather?” We all are, idiot. It’s in the sky.

211 Funny attitude quotes

More funny attitude quotes 👇

I’m not gonna have a bad day. The day is gonna have a bad me.

1 week ago

attitude, bad, bad day, confidence, day, humor, me, motivation, self-empowerment
Can’t stand when I’m determined to see something in a negative light, and somebody offers a different, healthier perspective. I already made up my mind to be upset. Don’t be rude.

1 week ago

attitude, determination, different, frustration, humor, i, light, mind, mindset, mood, negative, negativity, perspective, rude, sarcasm, somebody, something, stand, upset
We should be able to call in healthy: “I feel amazing today, and I’m not wasting it at work.”

1 week ago

able, amazing, attitude, call, call in sick, feel, health, healthy, humor, i, motivation, productivity, should, sick, today, wasting, work
“Are you getting your period?” God forbid I’m just evil.

1 week ago

attitude, evil, getting, God, humor, just, mood, period, sarcasm
I hate being in that mood where nothing’s really wrong but nothing feels right either.

1 week ago

attitude, being, confusion, emotion, feeling, feels, frustration, hate, i, mood, nothing, right, where, wrong
Worrying is just worshipping the problem.

1 week ago

attitude, humor, just, mindset, problem, stress, worry, worrying, worship
Anyone who thinks being a pessimist isn’t any fun fails to appreciate the joy of saying, ‘I told you so.’

1 week ago

anyone, appreciate, attitude, being, fails, fun, humor, i, i told you so, joy, optimism, pessimism, pessimist, sarcasm, saying, told
If I’m too much, go find less. I’m not running a clearance sale.

1 week ago

attitude, boundary, clearance, confidence, dating, humor, independence, less, much, personality, relationship, running, sale, self-worth, too
My middle finger salutes you.

1 week ago

attitude, finger, gesture, humor, insult, middle, middle finger, rude, rude gesture, salute, sarcasm
At therapy, saying “Don’t worry about it” to every question.

1 week ago

anxiety, attitude, casual, casual attitude, coping, coping mechanism, every, funny response, health, humor, mechanism, mental, mental health, question, response, saying, self-help, therapy, worry

For even more funny attitude quotes, hit next 👇

All funny attitude quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Threads this month:

Pouring rain, football on TV, empty house; the stuff dreams are made of.

52 shares on Discord this month:

There are some websites where my password management strategy is to just hit “Forgot my password” every time I need to log in.

80 shares on WeChat this month:

Better to be a wolf that everyone hates, than a donkey that everyone rides.

98 shares on TikTok this month:

Nobody is meaner to me than me. So take your shot.

38 shares on Discord this month:

You can tell Monopoly is an old game because there’s a luxury tax, and rich people can go to jail.

35 shares on Messenger this month:

Just realized doors really are floating in the air 24/7. I don’t like that.

79 shares on Messenger this month:

That moment you turn down the music while driving around looking for a street address, so you can see better.

48 shares on Facebook this month:

Only thing that can cure my depression is $500 million.

83 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

93 shares on Snapchat this month:

Group projects taught me how to do everything alone and trust no one.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

I ain’t typing “X” into the URL bar, my wife is right behind me.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

The most unrealistic part of Christmas movies isn’t the existence of Santa… it’s that all these people have, like, a month off work with no interruptions.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Some people post such depressing love shit that I start to miss their exes myself!

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Chuck Norris passed his driving test on foot.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

I knew school was a scam when my business teacher didn’t own a business, and my PE teacher was fat.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

I do not like how Netflix threatens to start the movie while I’m just tryna read the description. Like, please, you’re making me anxious.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

I hope this email finds you in the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

An easy way to check if you’re attractive: send a “Hey” DM and see if they reply.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

My dog understands several human words. I don’t understand any dog barks. He may be smarter than me.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Today is the Mondayest Thursday that has ever been mistaken for a Friday in the history of Wednesdays.

Going viral on YouTube:

Puberty was a hair-raising experience.

Just landed via Twitch:

The older I get, the easier it is for me to look at a situation and say: “Yeahhh, I’m out.”

Shared recently on WeChat:

My New Year’s resolution will be to stop chasing waterfalls, and stick to the rivers and the lakes that I’m used to.

Breaking via Threads:

Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”

Going viral on Instagram:

My laundry is done, but I don’t even want it anymore. The washing machine can keep it.

Making waves on Messenger:

A moth flies into your face out of nowhere. You could ask him why he does that, but what would you do with the information?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I’m officially at the age where I’m not upgrading my phone until it stops working.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Weed smokers be like, “Hold up — before we go to the store, I have to get scared.”

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I went to a mind reader. She almost went mad.

Activity Log ✨

211 Funny attitude quotes

More funny attitude quotes 👇

All funny attitude quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

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