Commentary:
Just when you thought 2023 couldn't get crazier, 2024's terms and conditions are still downloading… 🤔📜⏳
277 Funny before quotes
If we start flirting now, we could be in matching pajamas on a Christmas card before the holidays.
Commentary:
Time to strategize our pajama game plan—matching plaid or full-on reindeer print? 🛌🎄😂
Handing over my ID at the post office. The clerk said, “You’ve aged quite a bit since this photo was taken.” I said, “Yes, I had it taken just before I joined this queue.”
Commentary:
Time really flies when you're waiting in line! ⏳😅📬
Printers and computers treat each other like they broke up the night before, and you’re their mutual friend.
Commentary:
Sounds like they're stuck in a never-ending episode of "Tech Soap Opera: The Paper Jam Chronicles" 😂🖨️💔💻
Before social media, you had to actively go out and find crazy people.
Commentary:
Nowadays, they just pop up in your feed like uninvited guests at a party 🎉🙃
Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.
Commentary:
Sounds like the fridge was the original social media platform 🧊🎨😂
I hope one day I will sleep before midnight like normal humans do. Every day I sleep tomorrow, even yesterday I slept today.
Commentary:
I'm starting to think my sleep schedule is trying to time travel without me! ⏰🚀😴
Before I started my own business, I would suffer from anxiety on Sunday nights. But now that I run my own business, I have anxiety every night.
Commentary:
Every night is just another chance for my anxiety to throw a party and forget to invite sleep! 🎉😅💼
So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’
Commentary:
Who knew LEGO could get all shook up? 😂🕺🧱
I’m sorry I mistook all our laughs, long nights, sweet texts, and inside jokes as you caring. I’ll think twice before wasting my time again.
Commentary:
When you realize your love life is just one long comedy sketch 😂🎭⏰