Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

I love when women move on. It’s my favourite genre.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

When your parents are on a call and they ask for a pen, man, that pressure is real.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

My guardian angel is taking the longest smoking break in recorded history.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Occupation: the ugly friend!

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

When you’re talking to someone and you can tell they’re trying out a new word.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Way too many low IQ conspiracy theories floating around. Give me high IQ conspiracy theories.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

I haven’t posted a selfie in a while, but I’m still very cute. Just to keep you updated.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Doc, if I can vibecode anything and everyone else can vibecode anything, then what’s my competitive advantage?

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Have you tried making guacamole about it?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Just a few more hours of scrolling, and then I will finally know.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,531

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

I just really hope The Weeknd’s real name isn’t Mnday.

Trending via Twitch:

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I’m attracted to people that no one pays attention to.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

I’m a simple girl, really. I just want to watch the sunset, laugh, drink coffee, and read books. I also want a time machine and a pet dragon.

Trending via Discord:

Sometimes I wish I had a speed bump between my brain and my mouth.

Just landed via Threads:

I want to be gangsta but my grandma said no.

Just shared via TikTok:

Nothing in a household is said more lovingly than, “Can you bring me some toilet paper?”

Spreading quickly via X:

Japan’s greatest tragedy is having the world’s best toilets and no Mexican food. What’s the point of owning a Ferrari if you never take it to the track?

Trending via X:

Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I don’t understand how some people find love several times in their lives. I first have to find someone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

16 Funny bible quotes

Funny bible quotes bring a lighthearted twist to timeless wisdom, making ancient stories feel fresh and relatable 😂📖. They show that even sacred texts have moments of humor, proving faith and laughter go hand in hand 🙌😄. Perfect for sharing with friends or brightening your day, these witty gems remind us that joy is a divine gift 🎉✨. Get ready to smile and see the Bible in a whole new way! 😇💬

New funny bible quotes 👇

My favorite part of the Bible is when Jesus says to put a cross emoji and a Bible verse in your bio, and then call people slurs on the internet.

5 days ago

bible, Bible verse, bio, call, cross, cross emoji, emoji, favorite, humor, internet, Jesus, people, put, satire, slur, verse
My favorite part of the Bible is where God says, put a cross emoji in your bio and cheer on the dehumanization of minorities.

5 days ago

bible, bio, cheer, cross, cross emoji, dehumanization, emoji, favorite, God, minority, put, where
Your DM doesn’t match the Bible quote in your bio. Uh-oh.

5 days ago

bible, Bible quote, bio, contradiction, dating, DM, humor, match, media, message, profile, social, social media
Tonight we shall read a passage from the old testicle.

6 days ago

activity, bible, Bible parody, humor, joke, night, night activity, old, parody, pun, read, reading, testicle, tonight, wordplay
Stop giving kids Bible names but no Bible lessons. Moses tried to rob me last night.

6 days ago

bible, Bible lesson, Bible name, giving, humor, kid, kids, last, lesson, lessons, me, Moses, name, names, night, robbery, stop, tried
The Bible is 100% accurate when thrown at close range.

6 days ago

accuracy, accurate, bible, close, close range, humor, joke, range, sarcasm, throwing
Having a Bible verse in your bio doesn’t make you a good person.

1 week ago

bible, bio, good, goodness, having, humor, morality, person, personality, satire, verse
In the American Bible, Eve was made from part of a McRib.

1 week ago

American, bible, eve, fast, fast food, food, humor, joke, McRib, religious, religious joke, satire
Men with bibles names be the worst type of people.

1 week ago

bible, humor, men, name, people, worst
The first sin in the Bible was eating an apple. The second was murder. That escalated quickly.

1 week ago

apple, bible, eating, escalate, humor, irony, murder, religion, second, sin, storytelling

For even more funny bible quotes, hit next 👇

All funny bible quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Facebook this month:

One of the toughest jobs in parenting is serving the inevitable eviction notice on your kid’s pillow fort.

27 shares on Slack this month:

My favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking Grok, ‘Is this true?’ and then arguing with it when it doesn’t give him the answer he likes.

91 shares on Discord this month:

If I climbed all the way to the top of Mount Everest and looked up, then I’d finally see the top of our family’s weekly laundry pile.

50 shares on Twitch this month:

Why will Satan torture people in hell for disobeying the same God he disobeyed?

12 shares on YouTube this month:

Whitening my teeth by getting a tan.

89 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It’s like Facebook in real life.

16 shares on Threads this month:

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

30 shares on Threads this month:

8 year gap on resume that just says “karate”.

34 shares on YouTube this month:

I bet whenever a pilot drives a car there’s a brief moment of panic like “why isn’t it going up?”

56 shares on Telegram this month:

People will be like “there is no right or wrong way to do it” until you do it the wrong way.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Podcasts are like babies, they’re too easy to create and not everyone should have one.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, sleeping for work, getting ready for work, or thinking about work.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Before Facebook, we would hold people hostage inside our homes by showing them photo albums of our vacation.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Silently hoping for a comet to strike, to get out of today’s responsibilities.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

DMs full of guys who wouldn’t know what to do with me.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

She wanted me to impress her in the bedroom, so I showed her my organized sock drawer and my fresh matching bedding.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Talking to some people is like folding a fitted sheet.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

My card got declined at the barbershop so they put all the hair in my mouth and squeezed me until it came out of my head.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Soon as vampires become real, I’m first in line for my bite.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,646

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Scooby Doo was a woke-ass show. Every villain was just a landlord trying to scare people off their property so they could sell it.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

My boss told me to show initiative, so I decided to finish work early.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

50 is the new 30. Because it takes 50 bucks to buy what 30 used to.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Coffee should just be free for anybody over 30.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Bruschetta is 80% delicious and 20% mess.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

I’m still trying to dig myself out my ringtone debt from the late 90’s.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

I love saying “sounds good” at work, and no shit be sounding good.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Maybe making another financially irresponsible decision will fix me.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

The people who are $30 trillion in debt are giving you a credit score.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Everyone focused on the lip filler, but it’s really the chin filler that is the real villain.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

The greatest allies fascism and genocide have are the people who say, “I don’t follow the news, it’s too depressing.”

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I’m sick of living through history!

Going viral on Messenger:

(Talking to myself) I just don’t know what to tell you.

Broadcasted on X:

Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Just went to the Oreo website and hit “accept all cookies” … and now we wait.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Someone yelled “hey, retard!” and I looked back.

Trending via Snapchat:

“I’ve never done parkour, but I have chased a toddler with an open Sharpie through the house.”

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

They should make a Wikipedia for normal people. I should be able to google my barista.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s like 7 years in a row now.

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