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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

All of my passwords are protected by short-term memory loss.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Delightful if true: booby trap.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Working as a 911 operator but hanging up when someone starts screaming because I’m an empath, and it overwhelms me.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

The Wi-Fi stops working for 2 minutes, and suddenly I start thinking about life.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

I was going to learn to play the violin, but it was too much of a commitment. I wanted something with no strings attached.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

Throwing a spear at your enemy is a bad gamble. If you miss, you have no spear now and he’s just fine. He’s better than fine; now he has a spear.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Boxes of pasta don’t need a plastic window. I believe pasta is in the box.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Once this pandemic ends, I’m legit quitting video games and getting a girlfriend for real.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Whoever named it overthinking didn’t think hard enough, cause overthinking is never over.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,500

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Don’t even get into my car if you’re just gonna scream every time I hit something.

Seen just now on TikTok:

My ideal workday would be from 9:00 AM to 9:07 AM

Making waves on Discord:

Haunted house idea: a poorly lit Walmart littered with people you haven’t seen since high school.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Rudolph’s bright red nose would not have done anything to improve Santa’s visibility in dense fog.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Super excited about a brand new week of self-sabotage.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If you can’t wow them with wisdom, baffle them with bullshit.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Accidentally said I was on a diet instead of in a calorie deficit, and now everyone knows I’m from the 1900s.

Just landed via Discord:

Might quit my job to focus on summer.

Just landed via Facebook:

Having teens is fun because they demand their independence but then turn right around and ask you for $20.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Lovingly looking at my dog knowing I’m about to ruin her day with a bath.

Funny tech joke quotes

Funny tech joke quotes 🤖💻 are the perfect way to lighten up your day and geek out with a smile 😄✨. Whether you’re a coder, gamer, or just love all things tech, these witty one-liners will have you LOL’ing in no time 🚀😜. Ready to reboot your mood with some clever humor? Let’s dive into the hilarious side of technology! 😂🔧

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All funny tech joke quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Threads this month:

Dear recipe websites. I don’t need your life story. Just give me the recipe.

16 shares on WeChat this month:

I was having a great Friday until I found out it was Thursday.

70 shares on X this month:

Airbnb should have an option if you just want to use someone’s bathroom for a few minutes.

20 shares on X this month:

Gnocchi: The small, chubby children of spaghetti and potatoes.

54 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m not lazy, I’m just highly selective about what I suffer for.

20 shares on Twitch this month:

Every morning I wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made.

52 shares on Discord this month:

No one talks about the resentment you have towards yourself after you didn’t listen to your gut.

13 shares on TikTok this month:

I dropped and broke my phone today. Hurt more than childbirth!

52 shares on Snapchat this month:

There’s something meditative about cleaning. It’s the perfect time to reflect and plan revenge on every single person who has ever wronged you.

95 shares on Telegram this month:

This year has been the perfect blend of me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know much, but I do know melancholia is a way cooler diagnosis than depression.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Only at 27 do you become old, and then when you turn 30, you become younger than ever. That’s just how it goes.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The older I get, the more I lose my looks. But I’m also losing my eyesight, so it’s not my problem.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The amount of sleeping I’ve done over the past few days has been phenomenal. I genuinely love doing absolutely nothing.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If a government has online beef with a pop star, it has already lost.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Has anyone lived long enough to buy a second bottle of Worcestershire sauce?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I survived a Monday, and for what? Tuesday? Disgusting.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,378

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Yeah, bro, she’s probably just not using her phone right now, for the first time ever in her whole life.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Don’t mispronounce anything next to me and think I didn’t hear it.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

People my age are raising children, and I’m just here trying to bribe myself with treats into doing my own chores.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

The way I see it, eating chips while I wait for my pizza to arrive is no different than ordering a starter in a restaurant.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

On the one hand, I’d love to look sexy in a bikini. On the other hand, there’s cake.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Airplanes are so weird because how does a giant metal box stay in the air like that, and why am I craving tomato juice?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Dear Stomach, you’re bored, not hungry. So shut up.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Aliens are coming to Earth, people are going to the Moon, and I am still pushing on a door that says pull.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Can I come over and be your midnight snack?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

When they ask “how was your weekend?” answer “better than yours” and maintain eye contact.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Telegram:

What substance do I have to abuse to stop yearning?

Just shared via Instagram:

I caught two kids smoking pot outside my office. Fifteen minutes later, my boss caught me and two kids smoking pot outside my office.

Live now on Pinterest:

I’m like a semicolon, most people don’t know what to do with me.

Breaking via WeChat:

My first instinct when I see an animal is to say “hello.” My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.

Making waves on WeChat:

The food hits different when it ain’t yours.

Trending via Threads:

Alligators can live up to 100 years which is why there is an increased chance that they will see you later.

Spotted on Telegram:

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

Trending via WeChat:

There is certainly no life on other planets. Otherwise our government would have sent money there long ago.

Just shared via Twitch:

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Got banned from the sauna at my gym for saying “steam me up, Scotty” a few too many times.

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