79 Funny women quotes

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  1 month ago

  Share →: I respect the moon because it controls three of our most precious entities: oceans, wolves & women.

  Commentary:
  "When the moon is out there herding wolves, women, and waves, you know it's under a lot of pressure! 🌕🐺🌊👩‍🦰"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

  Commentary:
  "Guess we're lucky if we get a text back without needing a whole search party! 🏰🕵️‍♂️📱😂"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

  Commentary:
  Oh, the cruel irony of adulting hitting harder than expected! 🙈💁‍♀️ Who knew that "having it all" also meant having all the bills, responsibilities, and empty wine bottles? 🍷🏠 Hang in there, ladies – at least the apartment is nice! 💪😂 #AdultingAtItsFinest

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Turns out strange women lying in ponds distributing swords was a better basis for a system of government actually.

  Commentary:
  Well, sometimes you just have to trust the ladies in ponds with sharp objects, they might have better governmental advice than you think! 🗡️👩🌊 #SwordPowerGovernance

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Women love it when you approach them on the street and say “whoa, is there a hot babe convention in town?”

  Commentary:
  "Approaching women on the street with lines like 'whoa, is there a hot babe convention in town?' is like trying to catch a fish with a loudspeaker instead of a fishing rod 🎣🔊. Let's just say subtlety might work better than a bold approach in this case!"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Women who don’t check a man’s phone will still use their intuition and dreams to find out if he’s cheating.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the incredible superpower of women's intuition – capable of unlocking the mysteries of the universe, one dream and suspicion at a time! 🕵️‍♀️💭 It's like having a built-in CIA agent in your head, on a mission to expose any potential hanky-panky! 🔍😂 After all, who needs to check a phone when you have a direct line to the cosmic truth hotline?! 🌟📞 Remember, never underestimate the

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Just had a salad but it didn’t make me laugh like women in stock photos.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew salad could be so serious? 🥗😆 Maybe it needs some stand-up dressing! Just lettuce know when you want a good chuckle with your greens! 🥬😂"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Women will invite you to shower with them, then cook you alive with a temperature of water you didn’t know existed.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the siren song of temptation leading to a steamy demise! 🔥🚿 Beware of the waters that hold more surprises than a mystery novel. Some showers are not for the faint of heart but for the brave souls willing to risk a spontaneous sauna session. Proceed with caution, or you might end up as a well-done dish instead of a relaxed bather! 😅🔥"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

  Commentary:
  "Women are the ultimate multitaskers – thriving in the art of watching Netflix with subtitles while secretly running the world behind the scenes 📺💁‍♀️ Who says we can't do both? 😉"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

  Commentary:
  Well, maybe it's because Pete Davidson's humor is scripted for the big screen, while your whining is more of a live, uncut performance… But hey, who knows, maybe a little less whine and a little more comedy could be the winning ticket to your own Hollywood romance!

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