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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

I fall in love with a song and play it until I absolutely don’t wanna hear it no more.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

So, if I take out a reverse mortgage on my house does that mean I’ll own a bank after 30 years?

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

I’m a work in progress that hasn’t made much progress.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

So heartbreaking to do laundry and realize you can’t wash the clothes you’re literally wearing right now… you will never have a completely fresh start.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Nighttime is when I remember that one weird thing I said in 6th grade, and feel bad about it forever.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

I don’t have bad handwriting, I’m just using my own font.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Nobody gets angrier than a man being accused of something he actually did.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

“You shouldn’t let your cat jump on the counter”, my cat could take out a loan in my name if he wanted to.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Writers should get a direct line to the FBI so we can call them and give them a heads up when we’re googling ways to poison someone but just for a story.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,596

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Got a new high score on my bathroom scale.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I’m an ethical hater. My hate towards you is informed, balanced, and deeply nuanced.

Spotted on Instagram:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hrs, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.

Spotted on Facebook:

Potato chips ARE vegetables! I exclaim as I tear open the third bag.

Just landed via Facebook:

I’m begging for a day to be added in between Saturday and Sunday.

Breaking via Facebook:

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Going viral on Reddit:

The light at the end of the tunnel is only the headlight of the oncoming train.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

I literally just went through something, and now I’m going through something else. What’s next?

3 weeks ago

Playful quote about life's ongoing struggles, highlighting humor in constant challenges.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Looks like I'm on the 'something' rollercoaster and forgot to get off! 🎢😅 What's next, a loop-de-loop?"

anxiety, challenges, comedy, daily, daily struggle, else, going, humor, i, just, life, life challenges, next, overwhelm, relatability, something, stress, struggle, through

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20 shares on Reddit this month:

Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

32 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I read somewhere on the internet that 87% of what you read on the internet isn’t true, and I believe it.

59 shares on WeChat this month:

When I say I’m saving myself for marriage, what I mean is you won’t know how annoying I am until it’s too late.

99 shares on X this month:

Someone at work just farted and I panicked and said ‘compliments to the chef’.

84 shares on Telegram this month:

Don’t forget, you are someone’s weird colleague.

19 shares on Pinterest this month:

New cinephile technique “method watching” — when you watch a movie and then act and talk like the main character for 2 months.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

I think it’s time we acknowledged how incredibly stupid most super wealthy people are.

98 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m sorry I bit your hand when you reached for my popcorn.

87 shares on Discord this month:

Stop normalizing things, we’ll run out of the weird shit.

14 shares on Snapchat this month:

I need you to think about me 23/7. You get 1 hour a day for yourself.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Don’t suffer in silence. Make it everyone’s problem.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

The feelings I have for Tom Cruise are the closest approximation I have to what patriotism must feel like.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

There is nothing an orgasm can’t fix, I have researched it extensively.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

The whole “read before you go to bed to get sleepy” thing does not apply to me because I will be up till 5 a.m. if the book is worth it.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Parents be like “don’t believe everything you see on the internet” then believe everything they see on Facebook.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Hobosexual. A person who dates you with the sole interest of having a place to stay.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

Wait, making the right choices is an option?!

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

My husband was unable to find his coat earlier as he’d accidentally hung it up.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Babies first steal your glasses and then bite your nose. I don’t know where they get their reputation.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

Sure the Lego botanical sets are great but dusting them is another story.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Worst feeling is playing a game and having nobody to talk to about it.

Trending via Instagram:

No thank you, I only like men who have no interest in me.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Spotify has got it all wrong, the hottest single of the year is me.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

Just shared via Facebook:

Getting into male-dominated fields like falling asleep on the couch.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

She took all my money, called me fat, AND stabbed me in the arm. I hate doctor appointments.

Going viral on WeChat:

Never let your job prevent you from acting unemployed.

Spotted on Slack:

What doesn’t kill you will text you in 5 months to ask “What are you doing?”

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Activity Log ✨

I literally just went through something, and now I’m going through something else. What’s next?

Sweet, but twisted. Does that make me a candy cane?

I hope my parents feel proud. They scared me so bad about getting pregnant as a teenager that now they’re never getting grandkids.

“Delusional” ain’t a strong enough word to describe people anymore.

Me summer vacation planning: I’m going to Europe. Bank account: You’re going camping.

Hey, I came over because the grass seemed really green here, but now that I’m looking back that grass actually looks crazy green, so I’m gonna go.

So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.

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I literally just went through something, and now I’m going through something else. What’s next?

Keep the laugh going 😂

Sweet, but twisted. Does that make me a candy cane?

I hope my parents feel proud. They scared me so bad about getting pregnant as a teenager that now they’re never getting grandkids.

“Delusional” ain’t a strong enough word to describe people anymore.

Me summer vacation planning: I’m going to Europe. Bank account: You’re going camping.

Hey, I came over because the grass seemed really green here, but now that I’m looking back that grass actually looks crazy green, so I’m gonna go.

So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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