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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ด has downloaded:

Itโ€™s only a family vacation if you think โ€œWeโ€™re never doing this againโ€ at least once.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ has viewed:

Yes, Iโ€™m full of microplastics, but itโ€™s actually been helpful. Itโ€™s given me superpowers. I can communicate with Tupperware.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has shared:

Everyone thinks they wonโ€™t be that couple that goes from โ€˜everything you do is a turn-onโ€™ to โ€˜youโ€™re breathing too loud,โ€™ but they will be, oh, they will be.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

People are teaching their dogs how to skateboard and my dogโ€™s chart at the vet says โ€œmust be picked up, wonโ€™t walkโ€.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡น has bookmarked:

Whatโ€™s a polite way to tell someone you hope they get mauled by a bear?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

Telling your parents about your problems is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has viewed:

Life is just a series of Sopranos references with some other things mixed in.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡พ has downloaded:

Marry the man who treats your dumb questions like theyโ€™re NASA-level problems.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has viewed:

Car rides by yourself with loud musicโ€ฆ theyโ€™re good for the soul.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡น has viewed:

You’re an adult. You can do what you want. Waitโ€ฆYou have kids? Never mind.

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Insulting me won’t work. I already said that to myself earlier.

Insulting me won’t work. I already said that to myself earlier.

Commentary:
"Trying to insult me? Please, I already beat you to it in the mirror this morning! ๐Ÿ’โ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ˜‚ #SelfRoast"



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