26 Funny asleep quotes

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

Body: time to fall asleep. Brain: hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Body: time to fall asleep. Brain: hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it's "concerning"?

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Almost fell asleep while putting on the sweater because it got dark for a moment. That's all you need to know about my morning state.

Almost fell asleep while putting on the sweater because it got dark for a moment. That’s all you need to know about my morning state.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Whoever's been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.

Whoever’s been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Good morning to everyone except myself cause I wish I was still asleep.

Good morning to everyone except myself cause I wish I was still asleep.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

$Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’$

Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025