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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Before you just FaceTime me randomly, please don’t.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

The dude who invented the autocorrect has died. Restaurant in piece.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

So apparently problems don’t go away if you ignore them.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be OK.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

What do you mean it’s Monday? We just had Monday. This can’t be right.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Kinda miss when crushes were butterflies instead of complex emotional calculations about compatibility and red flags.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

I wonder if the guy who came up with the term “One Hit Wonder” came up with any other phrases?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

What’s the opposite of FOMO? The feeling of knowing you made the right decision not going somewhere once you see or hear dispatches from it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

629 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,222

Funny Quotes Topics

17,352

Funny Quotes Images

15,222

Dec 30, 2025

4,060

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

I am so out of shape right now, that if someone yelled “run for your life!” I’d be like “ya’ll go ahead, I’m meetin’ Jesus today!”

Going viral on YouTube:

My lip gloss used to be poppin’, now it’s my knees.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I have no prime. I will evolve till I die.

Going viral on Messenger:

Want to come over and lay around naked, eating grapes like we’re in a Renaissance painting.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I need a weighted blanket that won’t let me get out of bed in the morning.

Just landed via WeChat:

Putting a baby on board sticker on my car because other drivers have a right to know who they’re dealing with behind the wheel.

Broadcasted on Slack:

I love being a girly girl and going to sleep all moisturized, juicy, and soft. Lip balm on. Layering on scents just to beauty rest.

Spotted on Snapchat:

My default setting is sexual energy.

Going bananas on Reddit:

If ever go missing, please only put pictures of me on the news where I look skinny and hot even if that means they won’t find me.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Great news everyone! The priest who took my confession is expected to make a full recovery.

16 Funny demon quotes

Funny demon quotes bring a mischievous twist to your day 😈✨ Perfect for those who love a little dark humor with a wink 😉 From clever comebacks to cheeky one-liners, these devilish sayings will have you laughing in no time 😂🔥 Ready to embrace your inner imp and share some wickedly funny vibes? Let’s dive into the playful side of the underworld! 🎉👹

New funny demon quotes 👇

In your 20s, there will be an evil narcissist demon disguised as the man of your dreams. It’s important that you run from that loser before he steals your light.

0

1 month ago

20s, before, dating, demon, dream, dreams, evil, important, light, loser, love, man, narcissist, relationship, run
Clearly, hell is empty, the demons are all here.

0

2 months ago

demon, demons, empty, expression, hell, here, humor, sarcasm
Calm yourself, Lucifer. You did the right thing coming to me for advice.

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2 months ago

advice, calm, coming, conversation, demon, humor, Lucifer, me, right, thing, yourself
Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

0

2 months ago

demon, everyone, got, hair, humor, joke, OMG, once, possessed, possession, prank, something, supernatural, transformation
They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.

0

2 months ago

before, demon, eyes, humor, joke, killed, misunderstanding, paranormal, people, photograph, photography, red, stuff, supernatural, superstition, turned
People don’t have demonically glowing red eyes in photographs like they used to.

0

2 months ago

change, demon, eyes, glowing, humor, nostalgia, people, photograph, red, used
One day you’ll find someone who’s obsessed with you. It’ll probably be a demon but that’s what it is.

0

2 months ago

attraction, dating, day, demon, humor, love, obsession, relationship, someone
Rorschach tests are like so easy. Everything’s either a demon or a butterfly and it’s up to you to decide.

0

2 months ago

butterfly, decide, decision, demon, easy, humor, interpretation, perception, psychology, rorschach, Rorschach test, test, tests
If I got possessed demonically, I wouldn’t even notice it. With everything else I’ve got going on.

0

2 months ago

chaos, demon, else, even, everything, going, going on, humor, i, notice, possession
My exorcist thinks we should see other demons.

0

2 months ago

demon, demons, ex, exorcist, humor, joke, relationship, should

For even more funny demon quotes, hit next 👇

All funny demon quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m at the age where I won’t make eye contact with someone because they look like a “talker.”

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Amazing how fast my addiction to my phone is cured the moment I get a phone call.

70 shares on Snapchat this month:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Much of my algorithm is based on when I paused while scrolling to grab a snack.

55 shares on TikTok this month:

Y’all need to stop marrying people who look just like you do but with a wig on.

100 shares on WeChat this month:

“I should’ve peed before I left,” will be my epitaph.

34 shares on TikTok this month:

Procrastination isn’t a horrible thing. I mean, you always have something to do tomorrow… plus you have nothing to do today.

59 shares on Messenger this month:

Everyone who dramatically ‘quits’ social media is back in 48 hours like it was just a trial separation.

31 shares on Messenger this month:

Long-distance couples be like, “I can’t wait,” and then they wait.

97 shares on Instagram this month:

Old Spice doesn’t sound like something you wanna smell.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Requesting the Pink Panther theme song at karaoke and just standing on the stage motionless the entire time.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I smile at all animals, just not the human ones.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Where have you been all of my life and can you please go back there?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating apps aren’t working, time to walk into a cafe looking confused.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

If you keep the house dark, not only do you save on electricity, but it also looks cleaner.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Love Island is fun, but when is Job Island on?

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I relate to a rooster because I also want start off my day by screaming.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

629 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,222

Funny Quotes Topics

17,352

Funny Quotes Images

15,222

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,680

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Yoda, seeing himself in 4K: HDMI

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

I know how to use an abacus as a tambourine.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

I have entirely too many new bruises for someone who isn’t getting laid.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Tried Adderall to help my productivity but now I’m just intensely aware of all the things I should be doing.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

I’m a strong, independent woman, but like, against my will.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Did it hurt when you forgot your headphones and couldn’t romanticize your walk home?

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

Apparently, when you treat people like they treat you, they get upset.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Have you ever been in the car with someone who drives like we got extra lives?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

My favorite dance move is trying to get out of my own way.

Spotted on Discord:

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

Trending via X:

When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.

Freshly posted on Threads:

People see me spending money and think I’m rich. No, bro, I’m just irresponsible.

Spotted on Facebook:

I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s like 7 years in a row now.

Seen just now on Slack:

I wonder if the fall of Rome was this stupid.

Seen just now on Slack:

I’m sorry I bit your hand when you reached for my popcorn.

Making waves on Instagram:

My friend and I had a running joke. She said, “Let’s do a marathon,” and then we both laughed.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I miss when you could touch a TV and feel its fur.

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