Commentary:
๐ป "I considered quitting drinking tonight, but then I thought about the poor pub owner's family relying on my contributions. Hey, who am I to deprive them of their livelihood? Cheers to generosity with a side of guilt!" ๐คฃ #DrinkResponsibly #SupportLocalBusiness
85 Funny drinking quotes
Trending Funny Drinking Quotes ๐ฅ
- Sometimes I tell myself I should stop drinking so much, but Iโm not about to listen to a drunk whoโs talking to himself.
- My kids think Iโm going to miss them when they leave for college, but Iโll be busy drinking my coffee while itโs still hot.
- Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.
- I’m never drinking again, unless something is going on later today.
- Drinking at home is convenient, sure, but itโs nothing like the experience of leaving the pub feeling fifty bucks lighter.
More funny drinking quotes ๐
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Commentary:
Well, it sounds like someone's got their daily priorities sorted – coffee for the morning buzz, wine for the evening relaxation, and cheese for that delicious snack attack! ๐ทโ๏ธ๐ง Looks like this person knows the key ingredients for a well-balanced *ahem* lifestyle! -
Commentary:
"Remember, it's not called 'drinking alone' at work – it's just 'team-building' in progress! ๐ฅ๐ #ProfessionalCheers" -
Commentary:
"Feeling young is all fun and games until you give up caffeine and Ibuprofen! ๐ซโ๏ธ๐ Just wait for that reality check to hit you like a ton of bricks…and possibly some back pain. ๐ #AgingGracefully" -
Commentary:
"Who knew that feeling good could be such hard work? ๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐ฅ๐ง Maybe we should just stick to the couch, junk food, and soda for the sake of simplicity. But alas, where's the fun in that? ๐ #TheStruggleIsReal" -
Commentary:
"Polar bears sipping on Coca Cola, just don't forget the marshmallows for their hot cocoa! ๐ซ๐ง๐ฅคโ๏ธ #HolidayGoals #ChillVibes" -
Commentary:
"Who needs ice packs when you have cold beer for bruised egos? ๐บโ๏ธ Ego therapy at its finest – cheers to healing with a refreshing twist!" -
Commentary:
"Looks like we've got a new challenger for the ultimate party trick! ๐ท๐ง Sorry Jesus, seems like this person has some *serious* hydration skills on their side. ๐ช๐ #waterbender" -
Commentary:
"Ah, the ultimate VIP party for one! ๐ Who needs loud bars and crowded clubs when you've got your own exclusive solo soirรฉe at home? ๐ฅ Here's to being your very own best drinking buddy! ๐ป #PartyForOne" -
Commentary:
"Someone asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. I said '30 minutes' and realized that wasn't the right answer… unless they mean how long it takes me to pick one out! ๐ทโณ๐"
Top Funny Drinking Quotes ๐ฅ
- The only thing I love more than an open mind is an open bar.
- The golden rule of three beverages: one to hydrate, one to caffeinate, and one to celebrate.
- Men used to go to war, now they drinking matcha.
- You want to know how old you really feel? Stop drinking caffeine and popping Ibuprofen. Then, just wait.
- I let my cat smell every wine I drink so she can get a job as a sommelier and help pay my rent.
For even more funny drinking quotes, check out the next page, if available ๐
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Lifeโs too short for boring quotes โ thatโs why we keep adding new funny drinking quotes to brighten your day. โ๐
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