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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡© has downloaded:

When I say I’m Christmas shopping the β€œfor myself” is silent.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡ͺ has downloaded:

Sure I collect antiques, if you count the late-century spices in my pantry.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡· has shared:

Watching 2+ movies a day to prevent a thought from happening.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren’t happy.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡Ό has bookmarked:

Putting a baby on board sticker on my car because other drivers have a right to know who they’re dealing with behind the wheel.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡Ί has copied:

We’re all naughty, some just more than others.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡° has shared:

I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

I am like a wildflower, a quiet rebellion blooming through ruins and dust.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡Ό has copied:

I’m not mad, I just hope your socks slide off in your shoe all day.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡° has shared:

Dating is just wondering why someone is single and then slowly figuring it out.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,349

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Just shared via Instagram:

I’m one group chat away from vanishing into the woods to befriend forest creatures.

Shared recently on X:

Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I still make time for all my favorite hobbies, like drinking, swearing, and making people feel uncomfortable.

Seen just now on Telegram:

It’s so cold outside I saw a gangster pull his pants up and walk stiffly.

Trending via Facebook:

I’m only an introvert until I meet people worth extroverting with.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I’ve saved every episode of Hoarders.

Just landed via YouTube:

My teenager has really expensive taste for someone who can’t afford to buy their own toothpaste.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I want a hot body, but I also want hot wings.

Shared recently on Discord:

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

People often mistake me for an adult because of my age.

Playful quote highlighting mistaken identity due to youthful appearance.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah yes, the classic confusion between age and maturity – it's like mixing up broccoli with chocolate cake! πŸ§“πŸΌπŸ€” Don't worry, being mistaken for an adult is just a sign that you've already mastered the fine art of adulting… or at least looking the part! πŸ˜„πŸ‘” #ForeverYoung"

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Keep the laugh going πŸ˜‚

Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

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Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on Threads this month:

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

22 shares on WeChat this month:

I miss when my hardest decision was Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network.

98 shares on Twitch this month:

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

19 shares on Facebook this month:

We must all do our part for the planet. The other day I unplugged a row of electric cars nobody was using.

41 shares on Slack this month:

I know so many people with cats, and only a tiny number of them went to a shelter and picked out a cat. Everyone else I know with a cat has a story that’s like, ‘Yeah, he just moved in.’

59 shares on Messenger this month:

Cloud 9 is a very high place to fall from.

27 shares on Snapchat this month:

Is there anyone here old enough to remember when typing was a class in high school?

92 shares on Discord this month:

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

77 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

22 shares on Instagram this month:

Pretending I’m asleep so my boss has to carry me to the meeting.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

9 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

You’re not lazy, you’re just buffering in HD.

7 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

How is rent for 28 days the same amount as for 31 days? Where is my change?

16 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I failed as a person; I’m a dinosaur now.

23 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Girls … I understood why they advise us to get married and have kids before 25. Because after that, our brain starts working, and the decision won’t seem so reasonable anymore.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

What if you went to ET’s planet and all of the other ET’s were wearing clothes?

13 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Never underestimate my ability to stare out a window and not speak for hours on a car ride.

20 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.

21 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Doing nothing is hard. You never know when you are done.

24 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Wednesday is the part of the novel where the heroine stares out the window and questions everything.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,268

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡» has copied:

The winter months remind me that it is crucial to find someone that you’re thermostatically compatible with.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡­ has viewed:

My wife called to tell me she saw a fox on the way to work. I asked her how she knew it was on its way to work. She hung up on me.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

No one tells you that the older you get, the more often you check your weather app.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡· has shared:

With great power comes a great electricity bill.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ί has shared:

I’m tired of things costing money.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡² has downloaded:

The fact that someone looked straight at a purple onion and named it red onion really bothers me.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¦ has shared:

One of the worst ways to waste your youth is by being insecure.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡§ has shared:

In case any nudes of me should appear somewhere: It was very cold that day.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

The rain is pouring. So naturally it’s a good day to eat 6 donuts.

Someone from πŸ‡»πŸ‡Ί has copied:

Adulthood is just waking up tired one day, and then being tired forever after that.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spotted on Telegram:

My watch battery is fully charged. So I got some time.

Just landed via Snapchat:

If he has other girls who make him smile, be different and make him cry.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Bragging about how I’ve β€œreally turned my life around recently” without mentioning in which direction.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

“Can you explain the gap in your resume?” I went missing in a national park.

Making waves on Telegram:

I don’t freak out until I see the Buddhists freaking out.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Ten million people accused me of exaggerating today.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Money talks, and also waves goodbye.

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