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When I asked for a day when I'd actually get things done, I was really hoping for two days from now ๐
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Author Archives: slickboy
Kinda funny that if your religion loses enough wars, it gets downgraded to mythology after a generation or two.
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When your gods go from headlining the cosmic concert to opening for Zeus and crew ๐๐ธ๐ค
People donโt say โhobbyโ anymore. They say, โIโm low-key autistic, and this is my current special interest and hyperfixation.โ
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Using all that intense focus to become a master of obscure trivia, one hyperfixation at a time ๐๐ค๐
I really love the phrase “with all due respect” because it doesn’t specify how much respect is due. Could be none.
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With all due respect, this comment contains precisely the amount of respect you've earned: ๐ช๐๐ณ๏ธ #NoneRespec-tacular!
If you live in the Marvel Universe, at what point do you move out of New York?
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New York: Great pizza, terrifying daily commutes alongside Hulk and aliens ๐๐ฝ๐
We need a lengthy German word for that sinking sensation when, at lunch with a friend, you see that your friend has ordered a much better lunch than you did.
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Lunch envy: the wurst kind of betrayal! ๐ญ๐ฉ๐ฝ๏ธ
English cigarettes after sex. Call that fag post shag.
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When cigarettes need a cuddle after a good time ๐๐จ๐ด๓ ง๓ ข๓ ฅ๓ ฎ๓ ง๓ ฟ
So nobody can come up with counterfeit cars? I really donโt mind driving a Lambogigi Urusco or a Ranger Rovovo. I should just be able to afford it.
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Driving a "Ranger Rovovo": for when you want luxury, but your wallet says "let's get creative" ๐๐๐ธ
My boyfriend is absolutely refusing to do this sex position where he sits at the piano and plays a song about me, and I lie on the bed and shed a single perfect tear.
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I mean, with multitasking skills like that, you'd think he was Beethoven's rival! ๐น๐๐ง
Drank 6 beers. Feel amazing. Surely 6 more will double this feeling.
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This logic checks out, right? Math was never my strong suit! ๐ป๐ค๐คฃ