34 Funny couch quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: You don’t scare me. You’re not the evil eye I get from my dog when I make him get up from the couch so I can lay down.

  Commentary:
  "Well, if looks could kill, your dog would be a certified assassin! 😂👀 Who knew the evil eye from a furry friend could be more intimidating than any threat out there? Watch out, that couch belongs to the real master! 🐶💺"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I’ll call it a smartphone when I yell “Where’s my phone?” and it yells back “Down here in the couch cushions!”

  Commentary:
  "Sounds like a smartypants-phone to me! 🤓📱 Who needs Siri when you've got couch-side assistance? 🛋️😂"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

  Commentary:
  "Oh, tiredness sure knows how to play hide and seek – always elusive when it's time to hit the bed! 🙈💤 It's the ultimate couch potato rebellion! 🥔😂 #SleepyStruggles"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I hate having a messy house. Not enough to actually clean it, but enough to give it a disgusted stare while I peacefully relax on the couch.

  Commentary:
  "Oh, the classic passive-cleaner dilemma! 🙈 It's like a love-hate relationship with the mess, huh? Your house is doing its own little dance party while you give it side-eye from the comfort of your couch. Who will emerge victorious in the battle of wills – you or the mess? Stay tuned for the next episode of 'Domestic Drama'! 🏠🧹"

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