Funny quotes drink

97 Funny drink quotes

In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

Funny Quotes Mar 20, 2025

I only drink when I people.

Funny Quotes Mar 20, 2025

Be the reason someone spits out their drink today.

Funny Quotes Mar 20, 2025

Oh, you drink black coffee? Tell your ulcer I said good morning.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

I’ve reached that age where I don’t have to drink to forget because it just happens naturally now.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

My knight in shining armor comes in liquid form.

Funny Quotes Mar 17, 2025

Some people spend a fortune so they can circle the world. I drink some beer and the world circles around me.

Funny Quotes Mar 17, 2025

My youngest had a mandatory drugs and alcohol lecture today at school, and he still can’t mix a proper drink.

Funny Quotes Mar 16, 2025

Drink coffee, avoid idiots, read books and repeat.

Funny Quotes Mar 14, 2025

Coffee and more coffee is a perfect combo.

Funny Quotes Mar 9, 2025

Good morning only to those who duel at dawn, drink at dusk, and haunt their lovers in between.

Funny Quotes Mar 9, 2025

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

Funny Quotes Mar 8, 2025

Livin’ la vida vodka!

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

I love how these vegans still drink water. That’s a fish’s house!

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

Funny Quotes Feb 22, 2025

Coconut water taste like it’s been in someone else’s mouth.

Funny Quotes Feb 16, 2025

I drink all this water and for what. Just to pee? This planet is a prison.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I drink my coffee black because I like to save my calories for alcohol.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

“Still gangsta” I whisper to myself as I drink my chamomile tea with a heating pad on my back.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I accidentally poured vodka on my orange juice this morning. Twice.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

Straighten your back and drink some water, you dehydrated banana.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025