44 Funny drive quotes

• I don’t drink and drive, but some people drive me to drink.

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  2 months ago

  alcohol, drama, drink, drinking, drive, driving, friendship, humor, humor quote, i, me, party, people, relationship

• I wish I had the determination of my wife, who’s still flipping through radio stations as we pull into our driveway.

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  2 months ago

  daily, daily life, determination, drive, driveway, family, flipping, humor, i, life, patience, perseverance, pull, radio, radio station, relationship, station, stations, still, through, wife, wish

• The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

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  2 months ago

  accidentally, comedy, drive, fitness, gym, hit, humor, i, laziness, motivation, only, procrastination, workout

• I have the sex drive of a potato.

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  2 months ago

  comparison, drive, humor, i, potato, relationship, self-deprecation, sex, sex drive, wit

• If my coworker doesn’t stop asking questions on this Zoom meeting, I will drive across town and slap his face on the call.

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  2 months ago

  asking, call, coworker, drive, frustration, humor, meeting, question, slap, stop, work, Zoom

• Dear people, who drive without music playing, what do you do with your brain?

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  2 months ago

  activity, boredom, brain, curiosity, drive, driving, humor, music, people, playing

• Are they honking at me because I’m cute or because I can’t drive.

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  2 months ago

  attention, confidence, cute, drive, driving, honking, humor, i, me, self-deprecation

• I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

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  2 months ago

  brain, drive, forget, humor, i, swear, swear word, word, words

• Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

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  2 months ago

  desire, drive, existential, humor, joke, life, live, relationship, sex, sex drive, will to live, yes

• “Baby on board” Okay, well, can you tell him to drive faster?

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  2 months ago

  baby, board, drive, faster, humor, okay, parenting, sarcasm, tell, well

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