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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

I wouldn’t describe myself as an “adult”, per se. More like a “long child”.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Deja poo is when you feel like you’ve heard the same shit before.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

I’m not humiliating myself here for 3 likes. 10 maybe but not 3.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Just because I loved you at one point doesn’t mean I will always love you. I’m not Whitney Houston.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Double chins are better than double faces.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

They should invent a second airport for people who have been in public before.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

I need a long hot meteor shower.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Sundays are no place for pants or responsibility.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,257

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Facebook:

My AI-generated girlfriend is hotter than your real girlfriend.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

My teen is asking for noise-cancelling headphones like I’m going to give him the gift of ignoring me better.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I actually think my version of the lyrics makes more sense.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

Spotted on Messenger:

Animals be 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

The future is buffering.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

The question of whether an employer values its employees is sometimes answered by the toilet paper.

Making waves on Instagram:

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

Just shared via WeChat:

If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.

41 Funny excited quotes

Funny excited quotes are the perfect way to spark joy and laughter whenever your energy hits the roof! 🎉😂 Whether you’re pumped about the weekend, a big win, or just because, these hilarious lines capture that buzzing, can’t-keep-calm feeling. ⚡️🤩 Get ready to giggle, grin, and share the excitement with a twist of humor that brightens any mood instantly! 🌟😆

New funny excited quotes 👇

For even more funny excited quotes, hit next 👇

All funny excited quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

73 shares on Telegram this month:

Mom asked me what I was drinking the first time I got drunk and I said “breast milk” and now she’s not talking to me.

90 shares on Telegram this month:

Being loved right feels like telepathy and a little bit of witchcraft.

50 shares on Facebook this month:

When you’re talking to someone and you can tell they’re trying out a new word.

25 shares on Threads this month:

Is there a bravery award I can nominate my son for as he managed to eat his toast despite the fact I cut it wrong.

82 shares on Reddit this month:

Don’t think of it as losing followers, think of it as frustrating bots to the point they go away.

66 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m trying to be awesome today, but I’m too exhausted from being so awesome yesterday.

60 shares on YouTube this month:

Unfortunately for things, they have no choice but to work out for me.

60 shares on Instagram this month:

My toxic trait is when I’m bored, I start looking for flights to book.

32 shares on Reddit this month:

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

55 shares on Threads this month:

I’m the friend who shows up with a shovel and an alibi.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Just cleaned my room in case Beyoncé was somewhere close to my house and her car broke down, and she needed somewhere to sleep.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing worse than realising you vented to the wrong person.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I will trust someone on Reddit from 11 years ago with my life before using ChatGPT for anything.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Hello, boyfriend? It’s me, girlfriend, from dating?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

For years I thought an oncologist was just the doctor they kept on-call at all times.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Worst fears: 1. being infertile 2. being pregnant.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Being weird never goes out of style.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so single, even my husband won’t match with me on Tinder.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Please twerk; I have just days left.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I only write when I am falling in love, or falling apart.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,638

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

I’m forming a Wham! cover band with 3 other bald guys called Hairless Whisper.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Channeling my inner pretzel to achieve expert-level bad posture.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

I just want someone who can see through all my bullshit and hate me for who I really am.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

So many true crime podcasts are just like “a young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questioned”

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Super excited about a brand new week of questioning all my life choices.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Are you ever in the mood to get hit by a car and spend like one month in the hospital?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

I went for an interview at IKEA. The manager greeted me by saying “come in, make a seat”.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Despite all my rage, I still keep refreshing the page.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Why do babies stare at you like they know you from somewhere?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Welcome to your 40’s: you get excited about avocados now.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to skirt the issue.

Trending via WhatsApp:

You know it’s bad when people start telling you that you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

Trending via TikTok:

My child has entered the “Why?” stage of linguistic development, and I’ve realized I know absolutely nothing.

Breaking via X:

I bought my antidepressants off of Temu and now I glow in the dark.

Shared recently on Slack:

Eventually, kids get old enough to see which parent was the problem.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I can relate to God because it also takes me a full week to finish something that still kind of sucks.

Just shared via Discord:

It’s getting slide guitar and harmonica hot outside.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

The first step to recovery is addiction.

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