52 Funny free quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the ol' 'set them free and if they come back, they're probably just lost' strategy. 🤷‍♂️ Who knew relationships could be so confusing? Might need a GPS for this love rollercoaster! 🗺️🎢"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

  Commentary:
  Ah, Spotify, where time is merely a suggestion and ads are forever lurking in the shadows like ninjas 🕰️🎶 Don't worry, just sit back, relax, and get lost in the musical void… until suddenly, BAM! Ad-break attack! ⏳🎧 #SpotifyChronicles

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: After having received my free sample of winter, I would like to cancel my subscription please.

  Commentary:
  "Dear Winter, your free trial has ended and I am not interested in signing up for a full season subscription. Thank you, next! ❄️🚫 #WinterCancellation"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the perfect blend of wisdom and chaos 🚂💥 Who needs a life coach when you can just hang out with these 'train wreck experts' for some entertaining life lessons? 🤪🤷‍♂️"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Apple want $3,500 for their Vision Pro. No thanks. I can look like a dork for free.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs the Vision Pro when you can rock the 'dork chic' look for absolutely zero dollars 😎🤓 Save your cash, flaunt those oversized glasses, and embrace the style of a million bucks…even if it doesn't cost a penny!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: “Please feel free to ignore this email!” Way ahead of you, buddy.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the sweet satisfaction of beating the email to the punch! 😄📧 Ignoring emails like a pro! Keep scrolling, buddy! 😉 #EmailIgnored"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m fighting for free speech. Mine, not yours, so be quiet.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'free speech for me, not for thee' argument – a true masterpiece of irony. 🎤🤫 It's like saying 'I believe in sharing, but only if it's my ice cream!' 🍦😂 #SelectiveFreeSpeech #ShhJustListen"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

  Commentary:
  "Blood pressure kits: when the struggle to fit everything back in that tiny zip-up bag becomes the real test of your cardiovascular endurance. 💼😂 #ZipItRealGood"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I hate it when I’m at work and someone asks “are you at free at the moment?”. Please expand further so I can know if I’m free or not.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the eternal struggle of deciphering our availability while being ankle-deep in work tasks 🤔⏱️ Remember folks, if you see a colleague in the wild habitat of their workstation, chances are they are not on a tropical vacation 🏝️🚫 Just a friendly reminder from your office survival guide 😉📚 #WorkLifeBlues

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Everybody thinks “Free Hugs” signs are cute, unless you’re a boa constrictor.

  Commentary:
  "Free Hugs: Making humans happy, but terrifying snakes since forever. 🐍🤗 Just a friendly reminder to watch where you offer your affection! "

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