329 Funny relaxation quotes

• I love staying in a hotel. I’m eating room service in bed while I watch the worst TV show of all time on cable television. I’m working out in the gym and swimming in the pool. I’m using the amenities. To hell with Airbnb.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  Airbnb, amenity, bed, cable, cable television, eating, gym, hell, hotel, humor, i, leisure, love, pool, relaxation, room, room service, service, show, staying, swimming, swimming pool, television, time, TV, TV Show, using, vacation, watch, while, working, worst

• Evenings after work finish too quickly, one meal, one show, and it’s already tomorrow morning.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  after, evening, finish, meal, morning, night, relaxation, routine, show, sleep, time, tomorrow, too, work

• I do not want to have a career. I want to sit on the porch.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  career, humor, i, leisure, lifestyle, porch, relaxation, sit, want

• I don’t understand people who do things on weekends. You just did things all week. What’s next, more things? That’s how they get you.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  activity, doing, doing things, exhaustion, humor, i, just, next, people, procrastination, relaxation, sarcasm, things, understand, week, weekend, workweek

• Please congratulate me on my cool new position! It is the fetal position; I will be in it for a while.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  congratulation, fetal, fetal position, humor, i, joke, me, new, please, position, relaxation, rest, while

• Never underestimate the healing power of having your bed to yourself.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  bed, having, healing, healing power, never, power, relaxation, sleep, solitude, underestimate, yourself

• Are you ever so happy to be in bed, you wish you could be even more in bed than you already are?

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  bed, comfort, cozy, even, ever, funny question, happiness, happy, question, relaxation, sleep, wish

• An orgasm before bed is nature’s strongest sleep aid.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  aid, bed, bedtime, before, humor, nature, orgasm, relaxation, sleep, sleep aid

• I used to be cool, but now I just can’t wait to get on the couch by 7 p.m., in my pajamas, with a quilted blanket.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  aging, blanket, comfort, cool, couch, evening, humor, i, just, pajamas, relaxation, used, wait

• Feels like if cicadas are allowed to just sit in a tree and scream, I should also be.

  ---

  3 weeks ago

  allowed, cicada, feels, frustration, humor, i, just, nature, relaxation, scream, should, sit, tree

All funny relaxation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌