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Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ύ has bookmarked:

When I find it, I don’t need it. When I need it, I can’t find it.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡Ό has downloaded:

The longer I stay home, the more homeless I look.

Someone from πŸ‡ΎπŸ‡ͺ has copied:

No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping tube is still a fun thing to bonk someone over the head with.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡¦ has copied:

I wish I could Shazam a perfume.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡² has bookmarked:

Can’t think of a single time the MGM lion advanced the plot of the movie in any way. Just needless jump scare.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡­ has downloaded:

Please don’t tell me how bad your life was growing up, we had to manually roll up our car windows.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡± has shared:

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has bookmarked:

Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Έ has downloaded:

Two of the best things in life are laughing and orgasms. I want to make you do both a lot.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡­ has viewed:

“Excuse me, are you gonna finish those fries?” Me, interrupting a couple fighting.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

Updated

18 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Trending via Messenger:

If your cat has ever accidentally fallen into the tub while you were taking bath, you’ve known chaos.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Women are like apples; I like biting them.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

When waiting for a flight, there’s always one guy at the gate that makes you think, “As long as I’m not sitting next to him, I’ll be fine.”

Trending via WhatsApp:

Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

You can mess up big time letting someone know you have a printer.

Live now on X:

Not being able to teleport is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Can anyone recommend some good behaviors for someone who just started behaving?

Just shared via X:

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I wonder how many new moms try to pick out a unique name for their baby only to later learn it’s the name of an antidepressant.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Downloading the Titanic soundtrack. It’s syncing right now.

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Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

Updated

18 minutes ago

Users Online

3,449

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¦ has downloaded:

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¦ has downloaded:

I saw someone wearing a shirt today that said β€œEat Pasta Run Fasta,” and I can’t get it out of my head.

Someone from πŸ‡ΎπŸ‡ͺ has downloaded:

The only joke my mom ever made was me.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡§ has downloaded:

I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡­ has viewed:

If caterpillars are able to sleep for a long time and come out prettier, why cant I?

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡¦ has downloaded:

I didn’t like my beard at first… then it grew on me.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡± has copied:

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡· has downloaded:

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: β€œWow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡² has viewed:

Why is it called the Super Bowl if no one is bowling?

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡¨ has viewed:

I refuse to be bound by the social construct called “the calendar.” Merry Christmas, everyone.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Seen just now on X:

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

Shared recently on Discord:

My greatest aspiration is to one day solve a murder on a train.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Spotted on TikTok:

I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.

Shared recently on Threads:

Being a serial killer is much like being a comedian, in that you either hit it big and get your own Netflix special, or you spend eternity popping up on shitty podcasts.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

My retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding a buried treasure at some point.

Just landed via YouTube:

Why can’t more dumb people be shy?

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Spotted on Instagram:

Urgh. Trying to buy a copy of Catch-22 online but the seller won’t post it until I’ve paid and I won’t pay until I’ve received it.

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